Angel Eyes

Doctors Doctors Doctors!

2012-01-26T13:23:00.000-05:00

We're up to our ears in what seems like never ending doctor's appointments! December and January were a wash, I can't even count how many appointments plus the hospital stays....and February is slammed with appointments too. The problem is all of Zoya's annual appointments are coming back around right at the same time we're completing all of Mila's initial specialist appointments and all her follow up appointments! I spent a while on the phone this morning trying to get dates set up and my calendar organized! I called to set up:

*Reschedule Mila's kidney ultrasound she missed (yep they said we still have to do it) for Monday morning.
*Call cardiologist to ask about changing Mila's med dose (it's hurting her belly)...confirm her apt. on February 8th and Zoya's annual apt. on February 21.
*Call and stay on hold for what seemed like an hour and finally leave a message to schedule Mila's hearing evaluation, keeping in mind I'd like to try to schedule it the same day as her airway surgery follow up appointment in Pittsburgh so we don't have to make two trips on February 14th.
*Call Ear/Nose/Throat 3 times until someone finally answers to schedule Zoya's tube check appointment (February 21...and oh crap I just realized I scheduled that for the same day as her cardiology apt....darn it all!) Note to self: call ENT again to reschedule that...grrr
*Confirm Mila's Early Intervention Assessment appointment for January 31
*Write into calendar Zoya's eye appointment where she will likely be prescribed glasses-February 7
*Call Sleep Center to schedule sleep evaluation and possibly sleep study for Zoya (all kids with DS should have one done by the age of 4 and Princess girl is 4 months away from being 4 oh my)-March 29

And still left to do: Schedule Mila's shots, make an appointment for the feeding clinic in Pittsburgh for Mila, make apt. for bloodwork for Mila, and make an apt. for a massage for me! (that last one's optional....some day!)

These girls are worth it! A lot of times people say how hard it must be to have two children with special needs, and honestly there are so many things about them that are so much EASIER! But the doctor's appointments....the frequency and number of specialists is definitely a little more difficult...once we get all these initial appointments and surgery follow ups out of the way though, the appointments should definitely slow down a bit! I remember feeling a little nutty with doctor appointments when Zoya came home....but now I feel really nutty trying to keep track of two kids (go ahead you moms of many more than 2 and laugh at me!). I find myself giving the wrong name or birthdate because I get confused who I'm calling for after being on hold so long. I blame the brain of mush on the children....I've never been the same since..baaaaahaha!

Zoya Ice Skates!

2012-01-23T20:07:00.000-05:00

We have a super adaptive ice skating program here called Gliding Stars. We tried Zoya last year and she was super anxious and nervous between the helmet, skates, and walker, and then the whole ice skating thing. She did like being carried around the ice and skating fast in someone elses arms though :) Well tonight we went just to visit and Zoya was asking to skate, so she went out with Mike and took a few laps. Well I told her if she wanted to go back out she had to do it herself...to my surprise she said okay. I found her a walker and we adjusted it for her (without skates on) and she was laughing and excited so she was carried out to the ice in her walker and sneakers (baby steps). She LOVED it and didn't show any anxiety at all. If you would have seen her the last time we tried you'd be impressed with how excited she was and how little reservation she had!

We put some skates on her and she was a little hesitant but did about 2 laps (being pushed, but trying to move her feet). She a little nervous but her excitement took over and she loved hearing people cheer for her! I am so very proud of her....she has come such a long way! Her confidence is budding and it's so amazing to witness, especially when I think of the scared little girl we met almost 2 years ago!!! Way to go Zoya girl, we are so proud of you!! You rock!

Our Sunshines

2012-01-22T19:27:00.000-05:00

How's Zoya?

2012-01-21T17:56:00.001-05:00

well....that changes from minute to minute.....

With all the chaos, Zoya has had a little bit of a tough time. She is having some anxiety again, which always seems to peek when her routine is drastically changed, as it was with this last hospital stay. She is over her carseat aversion, for the most pat....but now is terrified if we leave the room without her. It's been fun....and almost impossible to get Mila down for a nap with Chatty Cathy following my every move and screaming hysterically if I even step foot out of the living room. She's got her eye on us like a hawk, making sure to keep us in sight at ALL TIMES. She has been especially clingy to her Daddy...maybe because she's stuck home all day with me :) She's doing best when kept very busy! She's doing fabulous with Mila and Mila just loves looking at and smiling at her big sister! Zoya has been talking a lot more lately but gets her words all mixed up with that darn apraxia. She'll say "I want please swing" or "please I want play"...but at least she's saying please and we get her point and that's all that matters! She tries SOOOOO hard to communicate with us and almost always gets her point across one way or another! We're so proud of her! She even ate lunch with her class in the big scary cafeteria for the first time and had no problems! She NEVER could have done that at the beginning of the school year, so accomplishments like that help keep her progress in perspective and it's a little easier not to get frustrated with minor setbacks like she's going through now. Her sleep has been a little off, but nothing terrible. She has been visiting with Grandma Liz next door and has asked me about 400 times since yesterday if she can visit "Lee" as she calls her. She even put her coat and boots on and said "Mama LEE house!"

See why she had so much fun...

And today Zoya got to spend some time playing in the snow with Daddy and Mya...I think Mya had more fun than anyone else (she's an Australian labradoodle for those of you who asked!)

Mya can jump!

Such a Daddy's girl lately!

Zoya seeking Daddy's comfort after she face-planted in the snow for the second time!

We'll just keep on pushing through for Zoya...life is settling down again and she is happier :)

Days Like This....

2012-01-17T20:15:00.000-05:00

Parenting is tough, no question about it. Going from one to two children in a year and a half is tough. Parenting kids with special needs is tough. Sorting out attachment/anxiety/adoption issues in your children is tough. Parenting a medically fragile babe is tough. Don't get me wrong, I'm so thankful for all that we have and wouldn't change it for anything, but today I'm disappointed in myself and my lack of patience, my frustration, my fatigue. I'm annoyed I can't be better at this. I fell short today for sure. I'm feeling misunderstood. I feel like I can't talk about the hard stuff because we chose this. We chose (and continue to choose) to follow God no matter what that means. We knew that meant tough days/weeks/months/seasons. We are in a difficult season, and I know it won't last forever, but trudging through in the moment is hard. We are being stretched in ways we never thought we could be. Hopefully we'll come out the other side stronger, more faithful. Days like today I question if we are right where we are supposed to be in this life. In my heart I know we are, but that ugly voice rears it's head more often than I'd like. If someone told us it would be this hard would we make the same decisions all over again? Probably, because this is what we were called to do, even on the worst, stinkiest, awful days where I feel like I couldn't have done any worse at this mother thing. I know we all have days like this, but I'm ready for some happier days...enjoying my girls and not stressing so much. We've been through a lot in these past 3 months, I need to cut myself some slack, but I'm so good at being my own worst critic, and it's so easy to let the enemy creep up on you and convince you that you've got it all wrong.

So thankful that tomorrow holds the promise of a new day and I can start all over....

Hangin' at Home

2012-01-07T19:07:00.000-05:00

A typical night at home.....where we've been spending A LOT of time...perhaps too much time! Ready for the Great Quarantine to be over!! But trying to make the best of it!

Christmas 2011

2012-01-03T09:44:00.001-05:00

Well since we thought we'd be in the hospital for Christmas Day, we celebrated the weekend before. It was a great day, but there was a definite sense of stress on my part with the looming surgery. I enjoyed it as much as I could but wish I could have let go and enjoyed it a little more. We had a nice morning and just like last year, Zoya took allll morning to open her presents. She liked opening one and playing with it for a while. We had to keep telling her she had more presents!

From us and Santa she received a Sid the Science Kid Talking doll, a toddler MP3 player, and a baby doll that can go in the bathtub! Her favorite is the MP3 player, or as we call it, her radio. It came with 20 songs preloaded onto it and we added some more of her favorite songs. She could carry that thing around all day if we'd let her! She and Mila got a pretty cool doorway swing from Uncle Bub and that gift was MY favorite! So good for therapy, and Mila can use it too when she is stronger. From us and Santa, Mila received a white noise sheep for her crib, a travel mobile (that she loves and that worked fabulous in the hospital), and a floor mirror.

The first present Zoya opened on Christmas eve was from Aunt Debbie and as she pulled back the paper she yelled MINNIE! And sure enough it was a Minnie Mouse Doll. So from then on, lots of the presents she opened on Christmas she was trying to guess what was inside by saying "Minnie?" or "Elmo?" It was cute. She got to open some of Mila's presents too and would ask before opening "Mila?" or "Zoya?" just to make sure she knew who it was for before she opened it!

This is when she discovered Minnie Mouse was inside the wrapping!

She loves Minnie!

Modeling her new princess dress!

Family of 4!

So excited for her Sid Doll

"I love him!"

Mila and Mama

Zoya's MP3 player

Attacking Daddy

She loves her pillow from Uncle Bub and sleeps with it every night!

Loved the doll from her Great Grandma P.

Reading her books from Thom and Annie and family! (I LOVE the book called "Beautiful Oops" that they got her...just fabulous!!!)

Mila hanging out on her first Christmas

She loved the wrapping paper!

The bunny is from great grandma and it says "jelly bean!" So perfect!!

More wrapping paper

beautiful sisters

Love how Zoya is looking at Mila

Zoya's new swing

She thinks her mama is silly

Mila says "this is exhausting"

More to come :)

*Also I've gotten many inquiries about my Ginkgo comment. I'm working on a post (in my spare time ha!)

Good Job Zoya!

2011-12-31T15:47:00.000-05:00

So I'm not a homeschooling mama but I am a teacher and I love teaching Zoya! She absolutely LOVES learning anything and everything! She takes such pride in her accomplishments. Recently I've seen her taking initiative and using and applying the skills she has learned and it makes me so proud of her! She knows her letters and numbers and can verbally identify all of them. The other day she was drawing on her magna doodle and she said, "Mama 'f'" and I looked down and sure enough her little doodle looked like the letter "f." I praised her a bunch and then she put her pen to the magna doodle again and did a little scribble that looked like a 2. She said, "Mama 2!" I called Shawn in because I couldn't even believe I was watching her make these connections all on her own outside of any letter lesson we did together. Do I think she could write a "2" or an "f" if I asked her? No, but she was making a connection between her scribble and her knowledge of numbers and letters and also between writing in general! She has been picking out letters everywhere we go and spelling the words on big signs, sweatshirts, her stroller, even on the buckle on the cart. She has been picking up books and "reading" them and I just think it's the sweetest thing ever! I love watching the wheels turn and seeing how she loves learning so much!

Soon I'll post Christmas pictures, I promise, but I wanted to remember this little moment first :)

A CHRISTMAS OF MIRACLES

2011-12-25T16:43:00.000-05:00

So you all know I certainly didn't have time to make this beautiful Christmas card!!! Thanks to JAE for taking the time to put together this fabulous card! The wording is perfect and the pictures are all my favorites from our photo shoot! I love blogging because all of you guys are just so kind...so supportive...so full of joy for our family! Thank you for sharing in all our our miracles this holiday season!

Merry Christmas

2011-12-16T22:15:00.000-05:00

The girls are nestled all snug in their beds...waiting for Santa to come tonight! Santa agreed to come a little early since we'll be in the hospital on Christmas for Mila's heart surgery recovery!

Zoya has been so excited and trying to open the presents under the tree for a couple days now. She keeps saying "Santa" and signing "presents" and then saying "TREE!" Tonight she prepared a plate of cookies for Santa and almost started crying when she realized they weren't for HER! So I had to give her a Hershey kiss to get her up to bed LOL. It took a bit for her to fall asleep as she was up there yelling "HO HO HO!" She knows tomorrow is a special day!

We decided to do 3 gifts for the girls this year...hey it was enough for Baby Jesus so it's enough for them.....and then Uncle Bub rolled into town with his sleigh full ;) He spoils his girls!

Truly we are so blessed this Christmas. Blessed to have so many amazing family and friends who are supporting us in every way imaginable. Blessed to have two beautiful daughters who make every day so special. Blessed to be spending Christmas in the hospital. Yep, that's right, blessed to be spending Christmas in the hospital. Because that means our jelly bean will be on the mend. That means she got the greatest gift of all....a chance at a new, healthy life. A gift of health and life is the best gift of all!

Merry Christmas from Zoya and the rest of the Basiles! (Photo courtesy of Grandma Liz)

Long Overdue Zoya Update!

2011-12-15T10:50:00.002-05:00

Even though I have very little time these days to sit down and write, I promised myself last night I'd write about Zoya because she is just turning into such a big girl lately! It is so cool to watch all the changes that are happening with her lately. I swear she grows overnight every night because each morning she looks more and more grown up to me!

Last night Zoya and I spent some one on one time in her room reading and singing and snuggling and hugging. She kept saying "more hug" and "woo woo too" (love you too). She is able to carry on a conversation with us between words and signs and I just think it's so cool to start hearing what she has to say. She gets her wants/needs across very well and follows directions to a T! She is so literal it cracks me up. I told her to stop touching her glass Elmo ornament and just to look with her eyes. So she got her little head as close to that ornament while sticking her butt out and tried to touch her eyes to the ornament. Then last night I said "Can you watch Mila for Mama?" (I was trying to make Zoya feel helpful and important) and Zoya walked right over to her, bent down hovering over her with her eyes an inch from Mila's and just "watched" her. I laughed so hard! She is such a good girl and has really put up with a lot of changes in the past couple of months.

She has shared us gracefully (except the week from you know where) and she has done fabulous during the times we can't be here with her because we are with Mila in Pittsburgh. Shawn and I are trying to be very intentional with her and giving lots of extra love and attention at every second we can. We are also very aware that we can't take advantage of the fact that she is doing so well on the outside and forget her emotional needs on the inside. It has been so difficult to balance caring for Mila in Pittsburgh and Zoya in Erie, and it's about to get a whole lot more difficult next week. We are blessed to have fantastic family and friends who have been so willing to help us. Thanks to Grandma and Grandpa B. and Aunt Jen Jen and Xavier for helping us love on Zoya while we can't be here.

Zoya is still doing fabulous with potty and wearing underwear everywhere (even school) except for naptime and bedtime. She still refuses to poop in the potty but I think she's getting closer because she has been obsessed with putting all her babies and animals on the potty and yelling POOP! haha. Let's hope it's right around the corner for her! Her speech is really coming along and she is saying new words every day. She was on the potty the other day and I heard her yelling SHADOW! SHADOW! SHADOW! And I peeked in and she was making shadow puppets on the wall haha! She loves singing and dancing and playing anything girly! Right now she is sitting on the floor next to me playing with her doll house. I love seeing her play appropriately. She just picked up the mama and said HUG and made her hug the daddy. The other day she was very quiet so I went into the playroom to check on her and she had a burp cloth under Elmo's butt and she had a diaper out and was wiping Elmo with wipes and putting a diaper on him! She must watch pretty closely! The best part was she was being sooo gentl with Elmo and it was just so sweet! I love seeing her act out love like this because I know we must be doing something right here. School is going good and she loves going....I think she wishes she could go every day because she asks just about every day if it's a school day. She has been able to tell me bits and pieces of her day which I just love.

I've been wanting to get a good video of Zoya singing because she just loves to sing and I love hearing her. So here is Mama and Zoya's Twinkle Twinkle duet!

(if you notice her right eye turning in....she'll be getting glasses in a couple of months to fix that! Then she'll really be a fashionista!)

And here is her acting out and singing "The Wheels on the Bus"

And a cute little one of Zoya answering my questions. One of her favorite things to do is name everyone in the room and point...I hear she likes to do that at school too!

I am the luckiest mama ever to spend my days with two sweet girls now! It's not always the easiest job, in fact it's the hardest job I've ever had, but it's the most fun too!

Christmas Cuteness!

2011-12-07T23:03:00.001-05:00

Since we weren't able to do breakfast with Santa this year because of the Great Quarantine, we had our own Christmas breakfast at our house instead. Grandma and Grandpa P. bought the sweetest Christmas dresses for the girls and so we Shawn cooked a fabulous breakfast and then we dressed the girls up in their beautiful dresses and attempted a photo shoot. It was such a sweet morning. I had hoped to do Christmas cards and send them out with Mila's adoption announcements, but logistically that's not looking too good....you might know....I've been a little busy!
So here are my favorites of our two precious daughters. Zoya was just the best model ever....Mila was not giving out any smiles during the photo shoot but her pictures just captivate me! I look at these pictures and think how in the world do I deserve these amazing girls?? They are our everything.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

The Monster has Disappeared!

2011-12-04T12:18:00.001-05:00

I'm happy to report that the monster that was lurking around here has dissapeared as quickly as she appeared. But I have to admit, I think a big part of her wild behavior was my fault. I realized a few days ago that just about the time that Zoya's behavior drastically changed, I changed the type of Ginkgo that we were giving her. She has taken the same type for a while now (helps her greatly with impulsivity, anxiety, and attention)...but the nutrition office ran out of her kind and so I got a *similar* one until they could order her typical one in. Literally the DAY I started her back on the old ginkgo, her mood swings, irritability, and outright tantrums decreased by about 95%! Now if I had made this change during a less dramatic time in Zoya's life (without the addition of a new baby sister along with all the other changes going on), I don't know if we would have seen as dramatic of a result. But I think the combination of the two was the perfect recipe for an ugly storm. So, although Zoya still needs reminders to be gentle with her sister, and although she still gets jealous at times, she is not acting like that monster we saw last week....Praise God! She really loves her sister and if Shawn or I take Zoya anywhere, she constantly asks "baby? home?" When she wakes up in the morning she asks, "baby?" She gets sad when her sister cries and tries to help by saying "Shh Shh Shh Baby"....and often it works to get Mila to stop crying! She has been such a big girl offering to help put away groceries, throwing out dirty diapers, getting wipes, and doing all of it so proudly! I hope the monster is gone for good and not lurking in a closet somewhere, but either way we'll just keep on lovin' like it's going out of style!

A Monster!

2011-11-28T17:59:00.000-05:00

We interrupt this usually cute blog to alert you that there is a monster lurking in the Basile household. Her name is Zoya and she can be seen poking her baby sister in the eye, telling her parents NO to everything they say, having long tantrums in time out, and peeing her pants on purpose to try to get out of time out (that trick only worked once but girl keeps tryin to see if it'll work again).

Guess the honeymoon is over folks.....
I guess after having your parents gone for weeks and then having them return with another little being that is getting just as much of her mama and daddy's love, it was bound to happen sooner or later. Hoping we're on the upswing of this after a brutal past 2 days!

Off to pour more love into my ~~devil~~ angel-child :)

Mila's First Thanksgiving! (and Zoya's Second)

2011-11-28T10:36:00.000-05:00

What perfect timing to have Mila home just in time to celebrate Thanksgiving! We are so thankful for her. We are thankful we decided to trust through the pain and loss of Laina and continue on so we could understand that Mila was God's plan all along for our family.

We just hung out here (we are keeping Mila on quarantine until surgery as to minimize her risk of getting sick). Grandma and Grandpa P. came for a visit and even brought Thanksgiving dinner with them to cook for us! It was lovely!

Zoya is a Big Sister!!

2011-11-23T19:30:00.000-05:00

I've gotten so many comments/emails asking to please update on how Zoya is doing as her role of big sister! We've been a bit busy but I'll do a quick little update!

Zoya is doing far better than we anticipated. I thought since she is the center of our universe, she might have a little more trouble adjusting to baby sister Mila. When Zoya met her at the airport she just loved her instantly. She is constantly around her wanting to touch her and love her. She sometimes needs reminders to be gentle, but overall is doing fabulous. We have been trying to intentionally make extra one on one time with Zoya to make the transition smoother. We've regressed her a little bit in some areas, such as holding her more than normal, snuggling her, and baby talking with her. We even gave her her own bottle because she was so interested in Mila's and got upset when she couldn't have it. As soon as we gave her her own she didn't want it any more ;) Reverse psychology at it's finest! She thinks the extra attention and treating her like a baby is funny and just eats it up. Some of you might be thinking why would we do this....one thing we found with Zoya is when change is present, or we are seeing anxiety, if we just regress her a tiny bit here and there she does fabulous. The first day home we noticed some whining and pouting and a few tears, but in all fairness to Zoya she was up late from the airport arrival and also sick. Hopefully this trend will continue and Zoya won't have any huge adjustment issues. I am thankful she is doing so well! I am so proud of our Zoya girl, she has dealt with all the changes from us being gone so long, all the way through sharing us with Mila. Having a baby really puts into perspecting how fast Zoya is growing up!

Usually when she comes home from school she runs right to her iPad and yells ELMO, because she knows if she had a good day at school she gets to watch Elmo. Well Shawn picked her up today and she came running in yelling "BABY!" She ran right over and was so excited to see Mila. She is still working on perfecting saying "Mila" so mostly she is calling her baby. Mila cried the other day and Zoya said "Mama, baby ba-ba." She could probably run the show if I needed to leave for a bit ;) Just kidding! Just as I thought Zoya is such a good helper. She will grab diapers or wipes, throw things out and even keep Mila entertained for a few minutes if I'm making a bottle!

*And after I typed all that Zoya kicked Mila and had the mother of all tantrums in time out. Ya win some, ya lose some....LOL!

Now what you all wanted to see....some sweet pictures of our beautiful daughters. We are so stinkin' blessed!

pretending she is a baby saying "sssshhhhhhh"

Practicing on the freaky life size doll (the doll is bigger than Mila LOL)

Aunt Jen Jen's Pictures :)

2011-11-12T17:13:00.001-05:00

We are so thankful for Aunt Jen Jen and Xavier who moved into our house and took fabulous care of Zoya while we were gone for THREE weeks! And also to Grandma and Grandpa B for doing some weekend duties! Jen knew our hearts needed to see pictures of our sweet girl daily and see how happy she was. She posted updates on facebook almost daily and it was so nice to get a peak into what our girl was up to! Here are some of my favorite pictures:

Zoya was a ballerina for her school halloween party

Isn't she just a beautiful ballerina?

Having more fun than everyone else because that's the way we do it!

Sweet girl in the halloween parade...

With big brother X :)

Getting ready for Zoo-Boo with Mario

Cute kitty cat and Mario

Zoya and her pumpkins before pumpkin time

Painting her white pumpkin (good idea Aunt Jen Jen!)

EEEWWW guts! Jen said she actually liked it, I guess this picture just shows her Ukrainian Babushka face she likes to make now and again! LOL

Sweet jammied babes!! Xavier is such a good friend to Zoya and takes such good care of her!

I had a couple pictures of Zoya and Grandma and Grandpa ~~but they were so blurry because Zoya was running circles around them~~ but they are burried in my horrendous email somewhere. :) But I hear Zoya had a fabulous time being spoiled rotten by them!

Reunion with Mama and Daddy....and Holy Cow Stop Growing Up so Fast Zoya!

2011-11-06T16:21:00.000-05:00

Leaving Zoya for 3 weeks was the hardest thing I've ever done as a Mama! My heart hurt every day being away from her. Shawn and I were so excited to see her, but we got in at midnight Friday night and thought since we were so tired it wouldn't be a good idea to wake her up in case she didn't feel like going back to sleep LOL. So Saturday morning at 7:30 am we busted in and surprised her in her room!! Look at this sweet smile when she realized it was us! Oh I love this girl!!!

I slightly worried that Zoya might be mad at us for leaving, even though I know that is so not her personality. Thank goodness she forgave us easily! She's already trying to see if the rules are the same at every chance she gets though ;) And I think you all should leave your children for 3 weeks....no not really, but oh my goodness it really gives you a good idea of just how much progress your child is making! It is hard to see the changes when you are with your child every single day, but if you go away for 3 weeks you will realize just how quickly they change! Zoya is now doing just about everything except driving....LOL, just kidding...but seriously...she is talking SO MUCH! I got a "wuh woo too mama" (love you too mama) and it melted my heart! She is singing along with her favorite songs. And she is in love with books all of a sudden. I had to read her favorite story to her about 3 times the first day home and she keeps bringing us books saying "ree pee" (read please). She snuggled up on my lap and just giggled she was so happy I was reading her favorite story, Pip. It's our special thing to read Pip together and I could tell she really missed it! She is "reading" books on her own. She picked up a bunny book called "Hop, hop, hop" and read "Hop, hop, hop", turned the page and read again, "Hop, hop, hop." I just sat there in amazement as she put her own words with the story! She can now say the dog's name "Mya" clear as day instead of calling her "dog." She asked for my apple and ate the entire thing without having it cut up. We got in the car today to go to the store and she said, "School?" and I said, "No, tomorrow." And she said "morrow." So we turned the opposite way that we go for school and she pointed where the school was and said "cool, morrow" (school, tomorrow). Aiy, I tell you this girl is not a baby anymore that's for sure! And she seems SO HUGE compared to tiny Mila. I haven't weighed her yet but I think she gained at least a pound while we were gone! LOL. Her face even seems more grown up to me. How can all this be in just 3 weeks??? I am thankful for this perspective because it really reminds me just how fast she is growing up.

We've been talking a lot about baby Mila. When we mention her, Zoya signs, "cry." And we say, "well what will you do when baby sister cries?" And Zoya says, "Shhhh baby." So cute! I can't wait to see Zoya's reaction to her baby sister! I know she is going to be such a great sister and a big helper to Mama and Daddy!! Thanks for all your prayers for our sweet girl! God truly protected Zoya during our time away and I like to think she only thought we were gone a few days instead of three weeks!

Pumpkin Patch Fun

2011-10-30T07:28:00.000-04:00

I'm missing my Zoya girl so much! Oh how I miss her hugs and sweet smile paired with her sassy diva-ness! I can't wait to hug her and squeeze her and snuggle her when we get home!! She's going to be a fabulous big sister I just know it!

Anyways...we went to the pumpkin patch the weekend before we left for Mila's adoption. Since October is almost over, I figured I should post these pictures of our fun day!

She loves the corn box!

This year nobody lost their wedding ring (aahhhheeeemmmm Shawn)

It's fun to get burried in corn!

It's raining corn!

Loves the big slide!

Picking her Pumpkin :)

Love that sweet girl!!

A "My Zoya-girl is Awesome" Letter

2011-10-16T16:50:00.000-04:00

Dear Zoya,

I miss you so much my heart aches. This is the first time Daddy and I have been away from you for more than one night. I know you’re having fun with Aunt Jen Jen and Xavier. I wish we could be with you but we can’t. You know that baby sister we’ve been talking a lot about? We’re going to meet her real soon. And one day I’ll be able to tell your little sister what a big brave girl you were to give up her mama and daddy for weeks so we could travel 5,000 miles away to meet her and bring her home to our family. I’m so proud of you for being such a big brave girl while we are gone. I hear Xavier is wearing you out and you’re happy to go down for your nap or to sleep at night! I’m glad he is breaking you in because when baby sister gets home life is going to get a little crazier, but a little more awesome too!

Everything reminds me of you. When we were in the airport they had the automatic paper towel dispensers where you wave your hands in front of them and paper towel magically appears. I thought of you and how you love that and how you love to keep waving your hands and getting more paper towels. When we pass by McDonalds I think of how happy french fries make you. When I heard all the Germans saying, “Hello” it reminded me of your funny accent when you say “Hello.” Zoya girl being away from you makes me realize how special you are. You have a way of making Every. Single. Little. Thing. So much fun! You bring so much joy to this world.

While I’m here I’m trying to worry less and live life big like you do every day. It is hard to do without your contagious spirit here beside me, but you’re in my heart and that helps! You’ve helped me to see the joy in things we take for granted. You’ve changed my heart in so many ways. I know all Mamas say this but we are so blessed to have you, we are the luckiest parents ever. I wish everyone could have a Zoya-girl but you’re all ours J Being apart from you makes me even more aware of the fact that you ROCK and you’ve seriously changed my perspective on life. You’re the reason we’re half way across the world right now. Because through you we’ve seen that God can taken broken spirits and make them whole again.

I am so lucky to be your mama and when I’m away from you it feels like I’m a ladybug missing her spots. Soon enough we will all be together my sweet girl!

*For those of you wondering Zoya is doing fabulous so far! Keep the prayers coming!!! We are so blessed to have Aunt Jen Jen in our lives!! We got to skype with Zoya tonight and she was amazed at being able to see an hear us. She sat and listened to us and talked a little for 15 minutes! She requested her favorite song, "More Beep Beep" and blew kisses and said, "Wuh wu" (love you). Oh how I miss her, but so good to see her doing so well!!! And I know I said I was taking a break here, but I needed to write a letter to my girl because I'm missing her!

ADOPTION BREAK!

2011-10-13T20:12:00.002-04:00

Taking a break from blogging here while we fly across the world to meet our second daughter!

Hoping to post frequent updates of our new babe on our adoption blog:

www.hopefulheartadoption.blogspot.com

Can't wait to see Zoya's reaction to her baby sister when we get home!

Hello!

2011-10-12T23:41:00.000-04:00

This morning when I went to get Zoya up, I had opened the door but not yet turned on the light and I hear her little voice say a perfect, "Hello" in a voice that sounded like it had an accent. It cracked me up. We had been working on saying "hello" but mostly just got "lo" or "hi." But this morning she nailed it and she's been saying it all day. It's just the cutest little word I think I've ever heard her say! It makes me laugh when I hear her little voice say it! Zoya's speech has been showing a lot of progress since she started preschool. I've been working with her on words that start with the "h" sound. It's tough for her to go from an unvoiced sound to a voiced sound but she's been doing a lot of vocal play and whispering lately and I'm loving the progress she's making! We've also been working on stopping sounds, especially "p" for "up" and "help" without saying "up-a" and "hepp-a." I took this little video after her bath tonight. Zoya girl is too sweet for words!

Surprise!

2011-10-10T21:28:00.001-04:00

We celebrated Uncle Bub's birthday this weekend because we will miss it when we are gone. When I told Zoya Uncle Bub was coming and it was his birthday she signed "surprise." A few weeks ago we went to a surprise birthday party. Zoya was so intrigued by this concept. We all sat in the garage and when the door opened everyone of course yelled "SURPRISE!" Zoya signed "surprise" the rest of the night and kept saying "more" and "up" (for the garage door to go up).

Ever since then she has been wanting to surprise people. She thinks its fun to send someone out of the room, turn the lights off and then turn the lights on when they come back and yell "surprise." LOL. She signs it and says "PRY" So when it was time for cake we sent Uncle Bub out of the kitchen, turned the lights off and when he walked in (so unsuspecting hahaha) we all yelled SURPRISE! Oh Zoya was sooo enthusiastic about it! We actually had to repeat the scene several times per Zoya's request. She looked at me like, "we really got him good mom!" So proud of herself!!!

SURPRISE!

It just never gets old!!!

Signing "Surprise!"

(Here is the ASL sign for surprise...pretty close!)

And what happened next had us laughing so hard we almost ~~peed our pants~~ cried! This girl is something else! At least she made it a memorable birthday for Uncle Bub!

(girl just started shaking her head like a wild woman and smearing frosting all over her face!)

"Aaaaannnnnd I'm DONE!"

I hope you enjoy these pictures as much as we enjoyed watching our crazy girl! And let me just say, that was one heck of a bath she needed after!! Oh how I'm going to miss my crazy love while we go adopt baby sister! But it will all be worth it in the end :)

Fall Fun!

2011-10-08T16:19:00.003-04:00

We are trying to enjoy our last weekend together as a family of three :) The weather here is absolutely gorgeous this time of year. I'm convinced there is no place more beautiful than where we live come fall time! The oranges and yellows and greens and reds and browns of the trees are breathtaking!

Here are some fun pictures from our day today at the fall festival!

Beautiful girl

Petting some animals...keeping a tight grip on Mama ;)

Mama doesn't love Llamas! Can you see it written all over my face?? LOL

I am showing this picture for no other reason than to show you this cool haircut on this animal LOL!

Feeding the goats

Zoya was trying to feed them hay instead of the food Daddy bought for 50 cents!

LOVE this picture...Zoya was thinking "don't move and he'll go away, just don't move a muscle!" She was frozen like that until the goat stuck his head back inside hahaha!

Helping Daddy feed her favorite goat

Love when she looks at me like this...my sweet girl loves me so much!

Matching faces here :)

They were shooting pumpkins at a target and it was loud and every time it went off Zoya did this and said "Weeeeeeee"

This girl FINALLY LOVES and appreciates ice cream!!! If you don't remember watch this video to see Zoya's first and typical reaction to ice cream for a long time!

But just look at her now...she appreciates the finer things in life...like chocolate peanut butter ice cream!!! YUM!

Daddy making her laugh!

Focusing...

Brain Freeze!!!

But it's sooooo worth it!

No idea what she was saying here....

Blurry but too cute not to share...so excited!

I am astounded by her beauty every day!

So beautiful this time of year!

On the way back we rolled the windows down and let the breeze blow through our hair! Zoya just loves doing this! Here she is signing "green" because we are stopped at a red light and she said "GOOOO" so the wind would blow through her hair and I told her we had to wait for a green light!

Oh this girl knows how to enjoy life....

Happy Fall Friends!!

Learning the Alphabet Part 2

2011-10-04T14:31:00.001-04:00

**Make sure you read the post prior to this one, or this one won't make much sense!

At this point Zoya can recognize all the letters of the alphabet and choose them from a lineup of 3 letters. She can verbally name about 2/3 of them and our goal is to be able to verbally identify all of them. Obviously there were a million little steps in getting her to learn the letters though. It is a lot of work for both myself and Zoya but she is determined and was actually ready for her letters. I think that is an important first step. I had tried working on letters with Zoya one time previously and she just wasn't into it so we took a break and tried again in a couple of months. Once she started learning her letters she started noticing letters and words around her. She would point to letters on shirts or signs and try to say "letters." Then she started being able to isolate some of those letters in places. Now she points out letters everywhere we go and yells their names....from items we are buying, to shopping carts, to people's clothes with letters, to books, to necklaces with words. I just love it! Anyways, my advice is, don't start working on letters until you think your child is ready or else you'll both just be frustrated!

My next piece of advice is break it down! And when you think you've broken things down enough, break it down again! If your end goal is for your child to read the letters of the alphabet you have to set short term benchmarks (here is the special ed. teacher in me talking!) I realize this might not interest everyone, but I've had a lot of people ask how exactly I went about teaching Zoya the letters. And it might seem pretty technical, but setting short term benchmark goals is just the dorky special ed. teacher in me....and it has worked! You can use this idea of having one overarching goal with several short term benchmark goals for any big goal you may have for your child. A lot of you probably already do this but maybe you've just never stopped to think about it.

Here are some short term benchmark goals I set for Zoya (with the overall goal being that she will speak each letter name when shown that letter in isolation) and how we transitioned from one short term goal to the next. You'll see that each short term goal builds on the short term goal before it and it's like climbing a ladder with your big goal at top! (When I talk about the cards-picture side up or black-letter side up, I'm talking about the double-sided flashcards I bought from Preschool Prep. One side has the letter character/picture and the other just has a black letter).

1. When shown one letter card, picture-side up (A-H upper and lowercase), Zoya will repeat the letter name (after hearing me say it) and/or give the sign/gesture that we came up with for that letter.
This is just a fun way to start getting to know the letters. While we did this I sang songs, or said the letters in funny voices...whatever I needed to do to keep Zoya interested!

2. Given three letters, picture-side up (meaning the character from the movie in the shape of the letter is what Zoya is to identify, not the actual black letter just yet), Zoya will point to the correct letter (letters A-H, both upper and lowercase).
Looking back I would have done letters A-D to start and broken it down even smaller). This goal was broken down into two smaller goals as I went along. When we first did these flashcards, picture-side up, I would give either an auditory or verbal clue to help jog her memory. Remember we had been watching the letter video (A-H) once a day and still were at this point. So for example, I'd say "Zoya can you find DANCING D?" Or, "Can you find G FOR GLASSES?" and then I'd sign glasses. This helped a lot in the beginning. When she had a couple weeks of practice doing it this way and started to get really good, then I'd just say, "Zoya find D" and then I'd wait. If she had trouble, then I'd give her the clue. Eventually she got to the point where she could point to the correct letter only hearing the letter name.
To transition to the next short term goal, when Zoya got really good at identifying the picture letters, I'd flip the card over and show her the black-letter side and have her repeat the letter again or just tell her the letter if she couldn't say it.

3. Given three letters, black-letter side up, Zoya will point to the correct letter (letters A-H, both upper and lowercase).
Again, this goal was broken down even smaller too. I started by placing two of the incorrect choices picture side up and putting the correct letter choice black-letter side up. Even if she caught onto the fact that I always asked her to pick the "black letter" it still helped her start to cement the letters. When she did well here, then I turned all three choices to the black-letter side. To begin, again, I would give her the letter name along with the clue to help jog her memory. Eventually we were able to move to just hearing the letter name and having her pick the correct choice. Some letters she learned before others, so when I knew she had learned a letter I'd just drop the clue. If I wasn't sure I'd give her the letter name without the clue, then wait, and if she wasn't sure I'd give her the clue/gesture/sign. To transition to the next goal, I'd say "Find D." Then when she found it, I'd ask, "What letter is that?" And since she had just heard it she was able to repeat it.

4. Zoya will verbally name each letter (letters A-H, both upper and lowercase).
This brings us back to the overall goal, and what you saw Zoya doing in the video. She still needs a lot of repetition and practice to cement all the letters into her brain :) Unlike kids without special learning needs, Zoya needs continual practice with skills she has already mastered so she does not lose the ground she has gained.

And when I got through all of these steps for letters A-H, I moved onto the next set. We are working on the third and last set of letters, which has proven to be the hardest for Zoya. Seriously...W and V and U and Y and Z...they're all too close! Those ones (except Z) confuse her! As you can see it's quite a process!!!!

In my next post, "Learning the Letters Part 3," I will write about some other supplemental tools we used during our letter-learning journey!

Learning the Alphabet Part 1

2011-10-03T11:05:00.004-04:00

The other day, I posted THIS VIDEO of Zoya reading some of the letters of the alphabet. Back in June, when I was done teaching for the summer, one of my summer goals for Zoya was for her to learn all the letters of the alphabet (just the letter names, not the sounds yet). We had already worked on COLORS, NUMBERS, and shapes (which I never blogged about). For all of these skills, I used the Preschool Prep Company materials. These materials are FABULOUS! Part of Zoya's Down Syndrome means she requires a lot of repetition and practice to master skills, as I've said before, and this program does just that! I cannot say enough good things about this program. And NO they're not paying me to promote them, although maybe they should??? LOL....I'm a pretty good advocate for these materials after seeing how amazing Zoya has done learning colors, numbers, shapes, and now letters.

That is not to say you can just buy the videos and pop them into the DVD player and walk away (although that probably might work with kids without special learning needs!) Just as with most materials, we need to adapt them to fit our kids best. So for the alphabet, I bought the DVD, the letter flashcards (they don't make number or color or shape flashcards, but if they did I would have bought them instead of making my own), and the board book with flaps. The DVD is nicely divided into three sections so that you can view the letters 8-9 at a time. This is really important because it would be unreasonable to expect Zoya to sit and watch the entire video of 54 letters (there are 54 because there are upper and lowercase and a fancy g and a fancy a) or to learn all 54 in one chunk. Zoya had been successful with colors and numbers and shapes because she was only expected to learn 8-11 colors/shapes/numbers (since numbers go 0-10). So I decided to divide the alphabet into the chunks that Preschool Prep recommended. That would mean Zoya would be learning 16-20 letters at a time. It did work for her, but in hindsight I probably would have broken it down even further and done 4 letters at a time (since they present upper and lowercase at one time that would mean 8 actual letters).

So we started watching the video once a day, just watching the first 8, or 9? (can't remember exactly) letters. I sat with her and reinforced the letters by saying them, or commenting about the letter character (A is an astronaut, B is a butterfly and bee, C is a cloud, etc). This association learning is an awesome concept and works wonderfully with Zoya. She remembers each character, just as she did with the colors, which in turn, helps her to remember the letter. Also, while we watched the DVD together, I gave many of the letters gestures (since the ASL signs for letters are too difficult for Zoya with her delayed fine motor skills). So in that video you could see Zoya doing gestures, which helped her to remember some of the letters. For letter "C" it looked like she was clapping, but she was actually signing "cloud." For D, she signs "dance" because the character on the DVD dances. For letter E, she points to her hear for "earring" because the character on the DVD wears earring. For G, it looks like she's hitting herself in the head like she finally remembered, but she is actually touching her eyes for "glasses," which, once again is how the DVD teaches the letter "G"...using characters with glasses and goggles. For H, she squeezes her face, which is her made up sign for "house"...I still don't know why she signs house this way LOL. For I, you can see her point to her eyeball....J, she signs "jump", etc. Using a combination of association learning, gestures, and the great visuals of the letter characters, Zoya was able to learn her letters!

More to come in Part 2......I will discuss some more activities that we did and how we used the letter flashcards!

Down Syndrome Awareness Month

2011-10-01T21:47:00.003-04:00

October is Down Syndrome Awareness Month! With us leaving in 13 days for Eastern Europe for our second adoption of another sweet angel girl with Down Syndrome, I certainly will not be participating in the "31 for 21" blogging challenge. There's just no way I will be able to post on here every day for the next month! BUT, I will try my hardest to get some good posts in before we leave about what Down Syndrome has meant to us, and hopefully some of the ways Zoya is a star!

For this first post, I'll leave you with a video of our bright star showing off her hard work naming some letters of the alphabet. I'll do a follow up post about what activities we've done to learn the letters of the alphabet!

Hop on Over

2011-09-27T19:24:00.005-04:00

And read our news :)

Adoption Blog

Rise....

2011-09-26T10:11:00.001-04:00

Could use your prayers....those of you who don't read our other blog....

Adoption Blog

Thanks friends

"Sorry"

2011-09-24T14:02:00.000-04:00

Zoya has perfected the word "sorry." LOL! This "sorry" was right after she was playing with the folding door and I asked her to stop so she wouldn't pinch her fingers. Once again she started playing with it and I said, "Zoya do NOT touch!" And she ever so gently, while staring me down, reached out and touched the door with one finger and looked at me like "what-do-ya-have-to-say-to-that-mom?" So this is her "after time-out" apology. She says it and signs it (sign looks more like "please" but its her "sorry"). It's funny she has started saying it on her own, like she does something she knows is wrong she'll say "sorry" real fast. She is somethin' else this girl!!

Zoya Talks about Her Day at School

2011-09-23T13:48:00.000-04:00

Zoya FINALLY made it back to school today!! She has a little bit of a cough, but feeling MUCH better and was so very excited when she heard she was going to school! Shawn took her and he said she ran over to one of her teachers and acted like she couldn't care less about saying goodbye to him! haha.She was so happy to see "B" and "Nana" and all her friends!

This video was taken when Zoya got home from school. We started a little communication page that her teacher fills out so I know a little about her day. It's so nice to be able to talk to her about her day and know what she did. So this is after I read her page to see how her morning went. She had been out of school since last Friday, so I expected her to have a little trouble following directions. Overall she did fabulous today, except her very first school time-out...which whipped her right into shape! She was not listening well so her teacher needed to use time out to send her a little message, and it worked :) I love that her teacher has high expectations for her and doesn't let her "Down Syndrome" be an excuse for poor choices.

She knows Zoya is capable of behaving well and she holds her to that expectation. It makes me laugh seeing the way she looks away when I ask her about time out. Then she says her version of "uh oh."

You can also hear her counting a little in the video. One of her favorite things to do at school is be the calendar helper and count the numbers.

We have noticed positive changes since Zoya has been in school and she is so happy when she comes home. It's almost like she is proud to be going to school....we can see that it makes her feel like a big kid and she thinks she is so cool! (She is :) ) Her speech is improving since being around typical peers, and she is interested in trying new activities with less anxiety. So proud of our big girl and all she has accomplished!!

A little info on our "time out technique"

We use our own version of "1-2-3 Magic" which is a behavior technique (and her teacher is using the same form at school). Basically if you give a directive that isn't being followed or your child is not listening/making a poor choice, you start counting 1-2-3. If you get to 3 they have to take a time out. The wording the technique uses is "1-2-3, take 5." We adapt it for Zoya and give a little more time in between each count and might look something like this:

"Zoya come here" (and then wait for 3 seconds)

(and if she doesn't comply) "Zoya, that's 1, please come here." (wait)

(still not complying) "Zoya, that's 2, you will have to go to time out if you don't listen, please come here." (wait)

"Zoya 3, go to time out."

(the funny part is she always complies when i say go to time out! haha)

I love it because it takes the frustration/emotion out of it and she always knows to expect the same consequence. It also gives her two choices: listen or go to time out. We use it a lot, and she responds VERY well and maybe only 1/20 times needs to go to time out. Her teacher has been using it at school and says Zoya responds very well to it and today was her first trip to time out (the first time the teacher actually got to 3). Zoya listens very well IF she knows she can't get away with her little tricks and IF others have high expectations for her.

The actual technique says children should go to their room for time out, but we don't do that. We do a time "in" where she can still see us but we are not interacting with her and she is missing whatever activity was going on. She sits for 2 minutes (we use the bottom stair for her time out place) and then apologizes and always a hug/kiss and a reminder why she had to go to time out.

Crawling Out from this Dark Hole!

2011-09-21T09:54:00.000-04:00

Well Zoya has been out of school for a week and sick for 7 LONNNNNNG days. This is by far the worst virus turned bacterial infection to ever visit her little body....poor girl. She's had every symptom you could imagine from vomiting to intestinal "issues" to sneezing and wheezing and coughing and hacking and swollen eyes, red throat, runny nose, stuffy nose, rattly chest, barky cough and more :( She's been pretty miserable. She's getting cabin fever for sure! I thought on Monday we took a turn for the better as she seemed to be making some progress, her fever from Saturday/Sunday finally broke and she seemed to have a little more energy...still not great by any means, but some improvement. So I thought for sure Tuesday would be better.

She woke up Tuesday very early with an awful cough and was just downright miserable. She was so phlemy (is that how you spell that??? LOL) and kept choking on it and was afraid to cough. She had an apt. to get her new Sure Steps (SMOs) so we did that quick then drove around and let her sleep until it was time for her ENT appointment (routine checkup for tubes). I knew this appointment was coming up so I was happy she'd be able to see the ENT and see what he thought. By this point I knew her virus had gotten stuck in her tiny anatomy (characteristic of Down Syndrome) and had turned bacterial (I partly knew bc she was only getting worse, not better, but she also had the WORST BREATH EVER). He agreed that she needed an antibiotic as it looked like she had a sinus infection and throat infection (remember we were just at the pediatrician Friday and she looked perfectly healthy in her ears/nose/throat). Oh and guess who was a champ with very little anxiety at her ENT appointment? She was even hamming it up and used her Darth Vadar voice to say hi to the doctor. She was intrigued by his blue gloves and even avoided the much hated "throat stick gag" by opening wide enough several times for the doctor to see her throat LOL. So proud of my girl.

I'm happy to say she woke up this morning seeming a bit more like herself after 2 doses of the antibiotic. She has an awful hacking cough but at least she is getting the phlem up and not choking on it like she had been. She's watching baby signing times, which has been her only wish through this sickness (funny because we haven't watched that in a very long time, but I guess she remembers it comforts her and makes her happy, so I'm more than happy to oblige). Hoping she can get back to school Friday and she won't have lost too much of the progress she's made as far as the school routine.

Oh, and guess who woke up sick today? Yep that would be this Mama :( UGH!!! I thought my body was fighting it off, but I guess between the lack of sleep and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches paired with tortilla chips and salsa for dinner weren't enough to keep me healthy...who would have known?

Preschool Germies and Doctors :(

2011-09-17T15:04:00.000-04:00

Zoya has had a tough start to preschool. She is usually very healthy and I can count on one hand how many times she's been sick since being home. We kept her home last year and had a sitter come to the house for many reasons, one of those was to give her body a chance to heal and build up immunities after orphanage life. So now that Zoya is in preschool she's being exposed to all kinds of germs and her poor body is not liking it!

Last Friday I kept Zoya home because she woke up with a little cough (no big deal) but then she threw up on me a little :( She hasn't thrown up since VACCINATION NIGHTMARE of May 2010...so definitely not normal for her. She bounced back by the next day and went to school Monday and Wednesday and then Thursday night she was throwing up again. Poor thing. Thursday night she woke up at about 11:30and threw up about every hour until 4:30am. She was pitiful. Even being so sick she was the sweetest thing. We kicked Daddy out and told him to go downstairs because he had to work in the morning (although he did go to the store to get medicine and then came running upstairs when he heard Zoya crying and me trying to find the light and catch her vomit all at the same time...TMI?). She was also coughing a lot and sounded very congested but was afraid to cough because that made her throw up...so that made things even worse. After getting sick at about 4am, I put her back down in our bed and layed down next to her. She put her hand on my cheeck and said her scooby doo version of "I love you." At 4am after being up all night that made my heart so happy. She just kept looking at me smiling through it all. I loved how she needed me and my Mama-love made it almost all better! Today she woke up happy as could be but had a fever that has gone up over the morning. She's taking her second nap of the day and hopefully she will start feeling much better soon!

Yesterday I took her to the doctor just to make sure there was nothing more going on than a bug because she can't really tell me if her ears or throat hurt. Also we've had some concerns about reflux lately and wanted to talk to the doctor about that. Over the last month of so Zoya has not been wanting to eat and gagging on her food sometimes, which has NEVER been an issue before. She has been waking up here and there gagging and when we check on her its almost like she might throw up (never does) or is choking. She gets hiccups 5-6 times a day sometimes too, which has always been the case with her. She also goes through periods where she coughs throughout the night-a dry cough. Soooo, the doctor wants to try her on Prevacid and see if that helps some of these symptoms, if not we will go through some testing to see whats up. The doctor thought she just had a little bug and some big reflux. (But at that time she didn't have the fever yet)

She has a follow-up appointment with the ENT Tuesday to get her tubes checked, so I'm glad they can take a look again and make sure nothing more is going on (like an ear infection or something) since she started the fever today. She also gets her new Sure Step orthodics Tuesday as well! She outgrew her other ones. When she came home her shoe size was a 2...she is now up to a 6 and will need a 7 with the braces.

She was at the dentist Thursday morning and did a fabulous job. She has gone twice before just for a real quick check and teeth count and "get to know the dentist" type thing. Shawn took her both times and she did NOT like it either time. So he was not looking forward to taking her this time. So we made a deal, I told him IF he takes Zoya AND Laina for all the bloodwork they need for the rest of their lives, I will take them to the dentist! LOL. I can deal with anxiety better than I can deal with watching my child be poked and be in pain :( So he laughed, but since I took Zoya the deal is on! She cried a little bit but was so brave and let them clean all her top teeth as she just laid there watching videos on my phone. She even wore some cool sunglasses! Then she thought she was done and they hadn't cleaned the bottom yet so she started crying but easily calmed herself down, which she NEVER would have been able to do months ago! She's making so much progress with the anxiety! In the past if she would have started crying at the dentist or somewhere else, she would not have stopped until we left...this time she calmed down and then charmed the entire office staff and didn't want to leave :) She even stopped by to visit a little boy having some cavities filled...he didn't mind :)

We have a new strategy for her anxiety called "take a deep breath" :) and I started it with her not really thinking it would work but its working amazingly well! She even does it on her own when she starts getting upset and 9 times out of 10 it keeps her from getting really upset or crying! She puts her hands above her head and takes a deep breath. This has been helpful to me because she will do it sometimes when I don't even realize she is feeling upset or anxious, so that has been a clue to us that she is feeling some anxiety. She initiates the deep breath on her own a lot and will do it easily if I remind her. In the middle of her crying I can say "take a deep breath" and she stops crying to take the deep breath, and then it's enough to calm her down. Whereas previously we would have had tears for hours sometimes. Yay for progress!

Here's hoping my little girl feels better soon!! And no more germies!

Some Videos of Miss Zoya

2011-09-14T21:45:00.002-04:00

A cute little girl named Izzy is missing her friend Zoya and has requested some videos....so here ya go sweet girl (and the rest of you LOL).

This is a little video of Zoya helping to take the dog for a walk. She looks like such a big kid to me here and the way she sways her body she looks so confident and like she just knows how cool she is HA! It's great!

You can also hear her "no" to my kisses request, which I hear a hundred times a day for any old request I might have...but she always give in in the end! She's also the kid who is doing what you asked all the while saying "no." That's my girl :)

In this video you can hear Zoya tell how old she is and hold up her fingers :) She also keeps asking for movies on my phone, which means videos of herself...she doesn't quite understand when I hold the phone up to take a video that she can't watch it until we make the video LOL. You can see her sign her version of "computer" which means she wants the iPad (her videos are on there too). She keeps trying to look behind her because she knows the iPad is in the living room and wants it!

There ya go Miss Izzy....a special post just for you! Zoya says HI!

No Thank You!

2011-09-12T10:57:00.001-04:00

I recently taught Zoya to say "no thank you" instead of "NO!" Sounds like a good idea right? She says no and then signs and approximates "thank you"...its so darn cute. What could be bad about that? Let me tell you....

Me: "Zoya eat your dinner"
Zoya: "No Thank You" (big smile)

Me: "Zoya go potty"
Zoya: "No Thank You" (big smile)

Me: "Zoya pick up your toys"
Zoya: "No Thank You" (big smile)

She is so darn proud of herself when she says "no thank you" because she knows she's being so polite....time for sister to learn when saying "no thank you" is NOT an option :) She is one smart cookie!!

Oh How I Love Her!

2011-09-07T22:40:00.001-04:00

This is a random blog post about Zoya-girl! Here is a video I took this morning when I got her up for school! Told ya I wasn't lying about how much she loves her Uncle Bub! LOL. And she did get to wear her blue shirt right until Daddy got her fish oil all over it (he says it wasn't his fault)...so we had to do a last minute switch to pink! Oh well. And all the things on her floor? She threw those out of her crib at some point during the night! See the beauty I get to wake up to every morning? So blessed!

This video is Zoya using her iPad to watch videos of herself. I was so happy that I found out how to put these videos on the ipad because Zoya seriously LOVES watching them and I can use it as a reward for her! She will do ANYTHING if she can watch her videos as a reward! I'm also excited because we are making lots of videos of the three of us and videos of us talking to her and she will be able to watch those when we are gone for Laina's adoption! Check out how good she is at navigating the iPad! It amazes me.

And here are some random cell phone pics that I just love!

Grandma and Grandpa P. came for a visit and this is one of the only pictures I got!! Boo! But it's a cute one!

This was Zoya's first outing in big girl underwear (picture is from a couple months ago and Zoya is potty trained for the most part yay!!)

Beautiful girl ready to head to Buffalo as our good luck charm for our fingerprints!

Loves her Sesame Street t-shirt!...Ready for school :)

Feeding baby.....she loves doing this :)

"Leave me alone and let me eat my pickle in peace!!!"

She takes after her Aunt Jennifer with her love of pickles!

Zoya playing with her light box!

"This is AMAZING mom!"

Smoochin' her friend "Nee Nee" as she calls him!

Watching the trains at the zoo

Beautiful Ballerina!

How could you ever be sad looking at this beaming ray of sunshine?

More dancing...

"Hi Mom!"

Lovin' her baby!

Can't go anywhere without her purse and her baby!

Tweety Bird Shirt from Grandma and Grandpa P.

Biggest goose egg yet! I'm gonna start calling her "CRASH"

Eating DQ....even better she is sitting all by herself somewhere other than home! Yay!!

Pippy Longstockings :)

Head over heels in love with my Zoya-girl!

Conversations with Zoya

2011-09-04T19:37:00.001-04:00

I love the little conversations Zoya and I have, mostly because they're so simple and sweet! And I'm really enjoying that we can have mini conversations with one another. I told her when she woke up from her nap that tomorrow we were going to see Uncle Bub. She got real big eyes and said and signed "BUB?!?!" and I said "yes!" Usually Uncle Bub comes here so I was trying to explain to her that we were going to go in the car to see him at HIS house. I don't know if she understood what I was saying. Anyways, an hour later Zoya was eating dinner and she said and signed "Bub" again and I said "yes tomorrow we will go see bub" and she said "happy." Oh I love her. I love that she could tell me in her own way that she was excited to go see her Uncle Bub. Then later as we were taking Mya potty Zoya looked at me and said and signed "Bub" AGAIN (this is why we don't tell her about visits with Bub until there is less than 24 hours to go to see him because she just keeps asking!) and I said "yes, after one more sleep you will see Uncle Bub." She smiled. The rest of the convesation went like this:

Zoya: (car noises)
Mama: "Yes, you're right we are going in the car to see Uncle Bub at his house this time."
Zoya: "Me, Mama" (then signs "together")
Mama: "Yes, Zoya and Mama are going together, are you forgetting anyone?"
Zoya: "Baby" (as she's holding her favorite baby)
Mama: "Yes baby can come too, but you forgot Daddy!"
Zoya: "Dada (pause), Zoya (pause), Mama (pause), Baby" (signs "together")
Mama: "Yes we are all going together."
Zoya: (looks at Mya) "Dog?" (in a questioning tone)
Mama: "No Mya is staying home."

And that was it...until 5 minutes later when I heard, "Mama, Bub?" Aiy!....Uncle Bub we are excited to see you tomorrow!!

2nd Day of School Pictures!!

2011-09-02T09:39:00.000-04:00

As promised.....from the mama whose brain has completely turned to mush during this stage of the adoption process.....

This pictures shows all of my favorite things about my beautiful Zoya...smiling so big her eyes turn into crescent moons, her unique ears bending at the tops, and a genuine toothy grin! Love her!

Her backpack is so big on her (even though it's tiny) that she almost falls over!

Keeping her eyes open for this one!

Ready for her SECOND day of preschool....!

Pickle Pictures!

2011-08-31T21:58:00.000-04:00

So even though I get the worst mother of the year award for taking a hundred pictures on a camera without a memory card for my baby's first day of preschool....I might have made up for it with these cute pickle pictures! Zoya loves dill pickles...my crazy girl :) But she doesn't like cold things a whole lot so I have to run the pickle under warm water....anyways, here she is enjoying her pickle!

I have convinced myself pickle pictures are way better than first day of preschool pictures (or at least I'm trying to believe that so I won't feel as bad). But seriously, how many other moms have pickle pictures? Just sayin ;)

Zoya's First REAL Day of Preschool Pictures!!

2011-08-31T14:27:00.000-04:00

Ahhh, I know how to draw my readers in with the word "pictures" BUT....there are none! I eagerly snapped away tons of pictures this morning of Zoya in her cute new outfit with her way too big backpack with smiles from ear to ear and the beauty of an angel.....BUT my memory card was never in the camera.....SIGH! Well now you know how I felt when I made that discovery. But trust me when I say THEY WOULD HAVE BEEN ADORABLE!!! Soooo....I will probably be the only mom who will have "2nd Day of Preschool" Pictures to remember her first year of preschool....oh well, what can you do?

Anyways, although Zoya did go to the same classroom with the same teachers one morning a week over the summer, I was still nervous about today. I am so very thankful we decided to send her one day a week over the summer to get used to her classroom and teachers and just being away from us. Since last week Zoya has been signing "school" and asking for "B" and "Anna" (classroom aide and teacher) and also signing "friends." It is so sweet, and I kept telling her that soon she'd be going to school more! I love that she loves school! There were only 5-7 other kids in her summer class and it was a very lax summer program...lots of playing and free choice...which was a perfect way to introduce Zoya to school! But since it was not as structured and it was very calm and quiet because they were the only kids in the building...I was worried how she would react today when the entire building was full of loud kids! Her class has abour 16 kids, which is a nice size, but triple the size she was used to over the summer.

But she did fantastic! She was a little hesitant and clingy when I left, but was fine as soon as I was gone. If you're wondering, the ONE time her Daddy took her to school she was just fine with no tears or clinginess! Go figure! Her teacher said she got a little sad at snack time (chairs plus food equal anxiety for Zoya), "B" as Zoya so enthusiastically calls her, sat with her and she was just peachy after that! Love that they know how to love on my girl and ease her anxieties! I heard that Zoya tried to make friends with a little girl who is pretty shy. Zoya showed the little girl her baby and then pulled a puppet off the shelf and handed it to the little girl. Hearing that just made my heart so happy. Although Zoya has a tough time communicating verbally, she is so very good at communicating through actions. I've always said our goals in school for Zoya are not to master algebra and spelling and other academic content, but rather to learn more important life skills such as compassion, friendship, problem solving, and respect. I think she is well on her way!

For those of you wondering, Zoya is in a typical preschool classroom. She will go MWF 9-11:15, and half way through the year we may decide to keep her there until noon, depending on how she is doing. The reason we decided to pick her up at 11:15 is because that class eats lunch in the BIG SCARY CAFETERIA with Kindergartners and 1st graders at 11:20, which we know would be way too tough for Zoya at this point, but I do believe she will get there eventually. Shawn didn't quite understand my fears and concerns of having Zoya eat lunch in the cafeteria UNTIL he came to school for her IEP in May! On his way in he passed by the cafeteria at the exact same time Zoya would be in there and he said UMMM YAH NO WAY! LOL. There are a couple of other children in Zoya's class with IEPs/special needs, so that is pretty cool! The classroom has one teacher and one full time aide, and another aide was recently added part time, so while Zoya is there, the ratio is about 1:5, which is not bad. I think most of the kids in the class are 4, so Zoya is on the younger side, but this works perfectly for Zoya as lots of these kids have already been in preschool and know the routine/rules, and will be good role models for her.

I requested a copy of the schedule, as well as a list of first names of the students in her class so that we can talk to her about her day and about her friends. Since she isn't able to tell us much of what happens at school, I'd like her to realize that we know some of the things she does at school, and know some of her friends names. Zoya kept saying "lay-lah" over and over and I couldn't figure it out. Every time I asked her what she did in school...she'd sign "play" and say lay-luh. Then I remembered a friend she already knows named "Makayla" is in her class and I'm pretty sure that's what she was telling me. Sooooo if I have the list and the schedule, maybe I can understand what she is telling me a little better :)

I loved seeing Zoya so proud of herself today when I picked her up. She waved goodbye and yelled "bye" and blew kisses to her friends. She knows she belongs, she knows she is valued and loved at school. I know she may not always feel that way, but I am soaking it up now while I can! I'm so proud of my big brave girl!

Zoya Spells Her Name

2011-08-30T20:07:00.000-04:00

I've been working a lot with Zoya on letters and her name lately. You can see a little of her hard work here. You'll have to turn your volume up so you can hear her little voice. She recognizes about half of the letters of the alphabet so far, upper and lowercase! I am also working on teaching her how to put the letters of her name in the right order. This is why I love short names for kids :)

Silly Singing Girl...

2011-08-25T21:09:00.007-04:00

*Video Problem Fixed...

No words needed...I love this girl!

More Life Lessons from My Wise 3 Year Old...

2011-08-24T23:50:00.001-04:00

I've said it a million times...when I grow up I want to be like Zoya. She is so wise beyond her years in so many ways. She get is....this game of life that the rest of us are still trying to figure out.

Make Someone's Day Brighter:
She knows how to snap me out of a bad mood instantly by calling, "mama" (in a very specific lovey tone) and waiting for my eyes to meet hers and then flashing me the biggest, toothiest grin she can must up...and she doesn't stop smiling until I muster up a smile myself. And she knows if I'm faking it!

Live in The Moment:
She knows how to live in the moment...like tonight when we were at the store and she found an Elmo and Big Bird t-shirt she just loved sooo much. She immediately tried to take off the shirt she was wearing (in the middle of the store) to put that shirt on right then and there! That girl wasn't gonna waste a second...because she knows life is precious and why put off 'til tomorrow what you can do today? And if you're wondering, yes I bought her the shirt and she is wearing it to school tomorrow because I've never seen her so excited about a piece of clothing before!

Make the Best of What You're Given:
She knows how to turn a dull moment into a party....like when I handed her the new potty seat I was buying for her to have at school....and she sat in the cart pretending the potty seat was a wheel, making car noises and tilting the "wheel" side to side (okay so she might know how to drive a little bit...maybe I let her sit on my lap and drive up and down the driveway....she sure knows how to put that baby in reverse!...no lectures please, we were in the driveway going less than one mile per hour...ha!)

Don't Put Off Letting Others Know How Much You Love Them:
She knows not to leave feelings unspoken...every day she gives us at least a dozen hugs and even more kisses and many "I love you's" just out of the blue (even if she does sound like scooby doo...I know what she's saying and it melts my heart).

Encourage Others:
She knows it makes other people feel good when you praise and encourage them. So I might never go potty again without having a round of applause from Zoya...but she sure knows how to encourage!

Take Pride in Your Accomplishments:
She knows she should be proud of herself because I can see that pride written all over her face when she accomplishes a new task or meets a new milestone, even if it takes her twice as long as everyone else. Like tonight when she strung together FIVE words that went like this "More, I want that, pretzels" (sounded like "mooo-ah, I oooooott dat pehpeh" She wanted more pretzels and she got them! When I cheered for her words a smile the size of Texas spread across her sweet face.

Dance to Life's Music:
She knows when music is playin' there's no other choice than to dance. At the first hint of music her little but starts swaying and her fingers start snapping and her head starts bobbing side to side. I don't think this girl can help herself when the music starts playing. Her life story, from orphan to cherished daughter is an intricately choreographed dance that she has perfected. She finds beauty in each moment...she dances her way through whether that moment be high or low.

I still have so much left to learn....and thus far my beautiful daughter has been my best teacher.

Deliverance

2011-08-18T15:05:00.000-04:00

Sometimes I can hardly believe....

that this sweet soul

spent almost two years confined to a crib

with no love

no mama

no daddy

and no joy.

Sister is makin' up for lost time now!

Nothing Better in this World...

2011-08-15T21:13:00.003-04:00

There is nothing better in this world than snuggling with my girl....

watching her eyes meet mine and her lips curl up at the ends in a little delightful smile as if to say "we've got a little secret-you and I-with this amazing love".....

counting her breaths as her chest rises and falls with each breath getting slower and more relaxed...

loving her eyelashes as they flutter open and closed, open and closed as she drifts off to dreamland in my arms....

smelling her sweetness as she breathes warm breaths onto my nose....

saying a little prayer that goes a little like this "thank you God for this gift that I don't deserve"....

running my fingers over her soft chubby cheeks....

adoring the way she sticks her tongue out just peaking past her lips...

wondering how I ever lived in this world without her....

More Visitors!!

2011-08-13T13:50:00.000-04:00

We've been very busy here at the Basile house this summer having some pretty cool visitors!! Of course you all know Summer and her family. They are in the process of bringing home another treasure! Stop on over and leave some love! Our families were featured together in an article HERE before we actually met in real life. I first met Summer, in real life, shortly after that article was published. We had a fun time meeting last summer, and then again after Belle was newly home, so I was so excited I would get to see her again this summer! I hadn't seen Belle since she had just gotten home and I just couldn't believe the changes in her! What a love bug that girl is! (And she loved my cheesy potatoes). Summer was a rock star, bringing her three 3 year olds without her husband...thank goodness her daughter Taylor was here to help! I do think that was the first time I've witnessed a mama changing two diapers at once all while another 3 year old monkey hung on her back! She is one talented woman!

And many of you know Teri (The Mac's House) who is such a great advocate and source of support for so many Reece's Rainbow families. Teri and I have been emailing for....hmmm...how long Teri?? Well since before we met Zoya I do believe!....so a long time! Teri is one heck of a woman let me tell you. She has encouraged me many times when I was feeling down and celebrated with me many times as well. It really does feel like she is family! She is one of the most generous women I have ever met and it amazes me to see how dedicated she is to helping RR families through leaving encouraging blog comments, donating to fundraisers, and just being an awesome cheerleader! She is a perfect example of how God calls ALL to take care of orphans. Even though she is not adopting a child herself, she goes above and beyond to help others in their adoptions! Her granddaughter, Izzy, and Zoya share a birthday and that shared birthday must be the reason they are so alike! Izzy loves seeing Zoya's pictures and videos on the blog so she was so excited to come and finally meet Zoya. You would have thought this girl has visited every day for the last year with her friendliness and hugs! She just can't get enough hugs...sweet angel! Soooo I was REALLY excited when Teri said they were coming to visit family close by us! Of course we had to plan a get together so we decided that Teri and her hubby Dan, their daughter Bri, and their granddaughter Izzy would come and visit WITH Summer, her daughters Taylor, Sara, and Belle, and her son Owen....WE HAD A PARTY!

One of the most amazing things about adoption is how it brings people together...families and friends, and people who you would have never met otherwise. I just love that part. So many of my close friends are friends I've met through adoption! During Zoya's adoption, and now with Laina's I am reminded how blessed we are to have all of the support that we do have!!

Here are some pictures of our fabulous party!

Zoya waiting for her party guests...

I think Teri was confused...she must have thought it was December 25th or something....she bought Summer and I beautiful bracelets!! And she brought toys for all the kids!!

Super Owen is strong enough to push a car!

Belle is the only one looking...she is saying thank you for the cheese potatoes!

Zoya just LOVED Dan! Excuse her mouth full but it was such a cute picture!

The Chaos!

Where is Shawn??

Anybody home?

Zoya wanted to wear her life jacket...I just go with the flow....

Girls playing ball with Mya

My beautiful girl...

Oh the fun of a tunnel! Even Mya wanted to play!

Shawn doing the "disappearing Owen act."

Playing together...

Super Mom with the three 3 year olds!

Love how Shawn loves on Belle!

Zoya and Daddy...

Bri lovin on Bellie :)

The June 3 birthday girls...

Giggling with Mr. Dan!

Everyone smile!

Another attempt...

Here comes a hug, Zoya-style!

Looks sweet and innocent right?

I think Izzy met her match in the hug wars!

Did you notice there is not one picture of Teri? She somehow missed all the shots!!! And I wish I would have thought to get a picture of myself with her and Summer...oh well that just means we have to do this again!!!

Catching Up....Camping

2011-08-08T21:41:00.000-04:00

We have been so busy around here lately with normal life and with Laina's adoption preparation. Things are moving quickly!

We have been having SOME fun though! We joined Shawn's family for the day where they were camping :)

Here are some pictures of our fun day! Somehow Grandma escaped all the pictures!

Me and my girl :)

Grandpa's girl...

Pretending to kiss Grandpa and licking him instead! She thinks this is hillarious...we are just waiting to get a call from school asking why she is licking people! Umm maybe because we laugh every time she does it!

Zoya and cousin Mattea looking scared after the ride started.

More Grandpa time

And more...Look at that smile!

Lovin' her some Daddy!

Hangin' with Aunt Kim

Taking a little rest in the shade!

These two cousins thought it'd be funny to crawl in the dog kennel...I think Zoya started it!

Let us out!

Taking after her Daddy loving the John Deere

Silly Girls

Taking a break

I guess we know who the ham is....

Trying to get a comparison picture from last year

Okay that is ENOUGH!

Just kidding, that was all a show, I was never really upset, that was my "fake cry" face

See? Happy!

This girl would prefer to always be in someone's arms...velcro girl!

Smoochin' on Daddy

Mattea was so funny posing for me to take pictures

Senior portrait?

How's this "hold the arm" pose Aunt Sarah?

I think Zoya is tired from such a fun day of camping!!!

More fun posts to come (if I can find another hour somehwere)!!!

I Want That!

2011-08-04T10:52:00.000-04:00

I wrote the other day how Zoya said "I want that" to me with no prompting at all...I tried to get it on video here. I'm so proud of her! It is probably hard for others to understand what she is saying but between her signs and words I think it's pretty cool...you can see how far she's come! You will see her "groping" for words and nothing comes out...that is very common with apraxia and something we are working on in therapy. Check out my big girl!

A Case of the Giggles

2011-08-02T21:19:00.000-04:00

Had to post this video...Zoya was cracking herself up on the way home from speech tonight. No worries Shawn was driving while I video taped her!

Maybe you had to be there but this girl had us laughing hysterically!

Back at the Top!

2011-08-01T16:12:00.000-04:00

Life is full of mountains, sometimes we're at the bottom looking up and sometimes we're at the top looking down while admiring our victories.....today we're at the top!! And I'm gonna celebrate!

Zoya had her best day ever at school last week! She sat in her chair for snack AND she sat for circle time on the carpet and wanted to help with calendar! Her teacher told her that this week she can be the calendar helper. She also asked her teacher to take her potty when the teacher had forgotten to take her! They go potty at 10:00 and then again at noon I believe. Zoya gets taken one time in between there usually. Her teacher told me that she had forgotten to take her and at about 11:15 Zoya signed "potty" to her :) No tears at all...the drop off was great for the most part...she was a little clingy but separated much better than in the past. And Zoya didn't want to leave when I came to pick her up.....she was so excited to see me and looked surprised when she looked up and I was standing at the door....she ran over to hug me and then went back to play. I had to bribe her with Elmo (which she earned anyways for a good day) to get her to leave!

Potty Training.....well Zoya seems to be potty trained...I am scared to type that though. For 3 weeks she has been dry! The past couple of days she has been in big girl underwear and stayed dry! We went for our first car ride without a pull up and she passed the test! She is able to hold it much longer in between and asks us to take her potty frequently throughout the day! She stayed dry for our two hour drive to visit family and the two hour drive back! Yesterday she even did #2 on the potty!!! She ran in while I was going potty and sat Elmo down on the seat next to me and said "poop." I said "HUH?" And she said MEEEE. I put her on and what do ya know.....big girl went!! Shawn came running down the stairs when he heard me screaming LOL. We had a Poop Party! I'm not holding my breath that this will happen again anytime soon, but a mama can dream right??

And speech....wow she is talking so much more. This therapy in Buffalo is really helping her. She has been saying "me do" and "me go" about a million times a day. Today I worked a lot with her on saying "I do" instead and she's got it down! She also said "I want more" (sounds like I wwaaahhh moooore-think New Jersey accent) to ask for more "makeup." When I put my makeup on in the morning, Zoya always asks for some and I run the brush over her nose...she loves it. So today when she said that I almost fell over! I said, "You want more???" And she smiled real big and said "YAH." I'm so proud of how hard she is trying. We've worked a lot on the word "up." Zoya says "uppa" because she always drops her jaw at the end. The PROMPT therapist showed me how to hold her jaw closed at the end of "up" and Zoya is now prompting herself to do it! It is pretty cute. We still have a LONG way to go but I'm excited to see such noticeable progress for the first time.

Zoya has really been changing before our eyes...I wonder if that has anything to do with the recent increased difficulty sleeping and separating....just so many changes going on in her little self! At any rate, I'm celebrating the view from the top of the mountain and enjoying it even more knowing I'll have days where I'll be at the bottom needing to remember how great it feels to climb back up to the top!

Pictures coming soon, I promise :)

Last Day of Fun with Carrington and Shelly :(

2011-07-29T22:18:00.000-04:00

Smooches

More smooches

Silly girls!

Zoya just loves "baby" (even though Carrington is older, Zoya calls her "baby")

"Look at me...I'm so talented I can do PT and make funny faces"

"Wait a minute I thought I was on vacation...why do I have to work on my skills?"

Shelly thought it'd be fun to try all the bargains on Zoya at once LOL. The tutu skirts with leggins are sizes 6-9 and 9-12 months for baby Laina...LOL.

Hanging out by the lake :)

Lovin' on Abby and Seth

Sailing the Zoya....

"Ummmm get this thing OFF me!!!"

"Okay this is not so bad afterall...a nice boat ride"

Seth snuggling Carrington

I can't believe our time together is coming to an end. It is such a blessing to meet another woman who is so much like myself...I swear we were sisters in another life! God is good and I love when he puts people in our lives for friendship, fellowship, and inspiration!

Contagious Laughter....

2011-07-28T23:05:00.000-04:00

This girl can laugh like no other....you can't help but crack up when you watch this video! I could have tickled her all night!! Shelly says I'm not allowed to play with Carrington before bed anymore because I got her all riled up! BUT she just went to check on her minutes after putting her to bed and she's sound asleep snoring!!! I guess I WILL be allowed to play with her before bed again...I wore her out! I told Shelly I needed to video tape her laughing because I just wanted to bottle it up. How can this not make you smile?

This is the child who was MINUTES from death. This is the child who was brought home at 3 and a half years old weighing ELEVEN pounds! This is the child who never knew laughter...for 3 and half years. This is the child who was deemed worthless by her society. This is the child who who was protected by God and held on long enough to know the love of a family....and who has changed more lives than any of us will ever be able to comprehend. God has a plan for this angel....I stand in amazement watching it unfold and looking into Carrington's beautiful soulful eyes and seeing a glimpse of heaven.

Lovin' on Carrington (and Shelly)

2011-07-28T15:04:00.001-04:00

She LOVES to be tossed in the air and dropped fast!! I think her mama is in trouble when she's old enough to ride roller coasters!!!! Could she be any sweeter????? :)

This girl is a daredevil!!!!

Silly Shawn making Carrington giggle!

Shawn and Carrington dancing

Zoya is sooo good with Carrington....even though it looks like she's clobbering her here she was gently stroking her face. She's going to make a great big sister!

Girls!

Carrington says "Hey Dad, I'm livin' the good life in this nice cool weather....miss you."

Kisses....Zoya can't give her enough kisses...

Sweet girls

More kisses :)

LOOK WHO IS VISITING!!!!!

2011-07-27T17:29:00.001-04:00

Shelly and Carrington are here!!!!!

Look Ethan-your mom is in the computer with Zoya!!!

I cannot even believe how much Carrington-bug has grown!!! She is 20 pounds, 2 ounces! woah! She is still teeny and the sweetest little love bug. We snuggled all afternoon and I got to hug and kiss this little blessing while Zoya napped (shh don't tell Zoya she'll be jealous). Carrington is a little daredevil who loves to be tossed and tickled. It was awesome to see her "dying laughing" instead of dying (period). God is good.

Oh and of course its nice to see Shelly too after our 2 year long email/phone relationship we finally get to meet!!! It is like we've known each other our whole lives....can't wait to stay up all night talking...thats what we do best!!!

Visitors :)

2011-07-27T10:01:00.000-04:00

Getting ready to pick up our extra special visitors from the airport....wait until you see who is coming!!!! :)

THANK YOU! and Questions Answered...

2011-07-26T22:50:00.002-04:00

Wow....I am humbled by all the comments and emails from all of you followers!!! You guys rock!! So many questions, thoughts, and ideas to look into....and so much support! My favorite comment was from anonymous, "I can say as a mother of 7 that kids are just nuts. I'm not kidding, if adults showed the type of behavior that I've seen in my 16 years of parenting my totally average kids, they would be on anti-psychotic medication." Right on sister! As I've said a million times, the hardest part of parenting a child with down syndrome who was adopted from an orphanage is trying to figure out what is causing some of the behaviors we see....DS? orphanage? toddler? Is it totally normals stuff other 'typical' kids face too or is it above and beyond that? Having not parented any children before Zoya I'm always wondering what is normal and whats not. My instincts tell me theres something more than just typical weird kid behaviors, though it did make me feel so much better to hear some of the stories you left about strange and unexplainable behaviors in your own kids or kids you know.

So to answer some questions.....

Do you use melatonin?
Yes...we have since we arrived home with Zoya and it really does help her to settle down and fall asleep. She sleeps so well the first couple hours, and then starts the tossing and turning. We've noticed she goes through cycles of sleeping well followed by not sleeping well. When she was first home she NEVER slept soundly. Then she'd have a few week period where she'd sleep well, followed by a long period of restlessness. The restless periods have gotten to be less and less the longer she has been home, but we still see the cycle of restless sleep....thankfully the restful sleep periods are lasting longer and longer...we just happen to be in a restless period right now. That makes me think its likely more anxiety related than medical related, but I don't know.

We had better results with a Magnesium supplement. It is a natural stool softener and worked wonders. Ours was in powder form from Kirkman labs (mail order or we would purchase it at our Dr. s office). Another way to get magnesium into their systems is through a long soak in an Epsom Salt bath. We also noticed that after we started the oral Magnesium supplement, our son seemed to sleep better through the night. (Thank you Lord!) I believe (and I've read) that it has a calming effect on the nervous system.
Thanks for this info...Zoya sees a nutrition specialist and I will ask about the magnesium. She takes calcium nightly which really helps to calm her as well...not sure if it has magnesium in it or not. I will definitely check into this. And cool advice on the epsom salt bath..thanks!

I know it sounds bad, but could she be sleeping too much (during the day)?
I really don't think so because she gets very crabby and tired and will lay on the floor and yawn and rub her eyes if it is past nap time some days. Some days I think she could skip the nap and be fine, but most days I know she really needs it. She falls asleep at night almost as soon as I put her in her bed.

Have you had her checked out physically lately to make sure there's no underlying illness such as blood sugar issues etc?
I don't know that there's ever been a thought to check blood sugar levels unless that is part of routine blood work that she would have had done.

Maybe that's just a coincidence, but when my son's doctor says to be careful to recognize the symptoms of hypothyroidism, she mentions the symptoms you mentioned above. We check the hormones once a year. Have you had this testing done?
Yes she is up to date on her annual thyroid testing...she will be due again in November. Everything was normal last time.

How does her anxiety manifest itself? Crying? Restlessness?
CRYING....LOTS OF CRYING. Funny thing is she pretty much had no idea how to cry when we met her. Then one day she realized her needs are met and she gets attention when she cries and she can cry to communicate with us. Then I wished she never learned to cry...LOL jk. Then she started having uncontrollable crying....like she could NOT get herself under control. She is learning to control her crying a bit better, but sometimes I feel like its a ticking time bomb never knowing when she'll just start crying due to anxiety....like if we go out to eat or something she is fine one minute and then has a look of terror the next. I went through a little bout of anxiety years ago and I remember feeling so out of control of my emotions so I wonder if she feels the same. We are trying to give her lots of tools to calm herself down when she starts getting upset. Like requesting her happy pillow or trying to let her feel in control by giving her choices. Often she will ask for us to pick her up and then she feels much safer, but lately even THAT hasn't been enough at times.

Does the anxiety go away? Like, at speech does she relax? or is she anxious the entire time?
The anxiety usually lessens usually doesn't completely go away...she is always "on guard" in new situations. Like tonight at speech she was anxious at the beginning, then started to relax quite a bit, then every strange sound she heard (people walking or sneezing) she tensed up and got scared. Sudden sounds have really been bothering her lately and triggering anxiety. My brother sneezed really loud this weekend and it scared her so bad that she wouldn't even go near him until the next day LOL.

Also, I meant to add we are taking a break from therapy for the summer. Maybe a short break might be good for you, too?
Besides speech therapy we don't do any other outside therapies. We have been talking a lot about what we can cut out because we pretty much went from all in home therapies and not much else out of the house to outside speech therapy twice a week, swimming lessons, AND preschool, which could be a cause for the increased anxiety we are seeing. Too much too quick for Zoya. Swimming lessons are over, preschool is just once a week (but will be 3 mornings a week in the fall-we are working on a plan to slowly ease her into it).

From what I understand, it's recommended that every child with Ds have a sleep study by the age of 3. Apnea is just so prevalent. AND What does your doctor say about sleep apnea? Up to 75% of kiddos with down syndrome have sleep apnea (source is Up To Date)and it causes a myriad of problems.... Might be worth checking out- I believe that every child with down syndrome should have a sleep study done due to the likelihood of apnea.
I understand that as well (although no thanks to any doctor we've ever seen even bringing it up)...I found that fact out on my own and asked her primary ped. about it and she said a sleep study would be a nightmare for Zoya (which I totally agree with) and unless she is having issues that would point toward a sleeping disorder that she didnt' see a need. When we go back to the DS clinic in the fall I'm going to ask about it. But usually when doctors ask how she sleeps I say GREAT bc she sleeps so long...I tell them she has on and off cycles of restless sleep but nobody really seems concerned. She only snores if she has a cold...I know apnea can be present without snoring contrary to popular belief....but the usual options to fix it are to have tonsils and adenoids out and/or a c-pap machine....I really don't see Zoya keeping that on throughout the night.
I would recommend trying prune juice mixed with apple or orange juice. You can serve it cold or warmed up a touch. A small glass a day surely does wonders- a doctor I followed gave this in the hospital before starting any medications :)
We do diluted apple juice....the only thing about juices is the sugar content...Zoya does NOT do well with sugar so we try to keep the juices to a minimum...even natural fruit juices don't go over well with her. We tried regular prunes but Zoya gagged on those.

Anxiety- is one of the physicians that you are looking at talking to a developmental behavioral pediatrician? I rotated with one of these and he was FANTASTIC!!! May be something to look into if you are interested- in general they give parents strategies to deal with the behaviors to help the child cope.
The place we are hoping to get into in Cleveland has a DBP....this would be helpful (I hope they can give us ideas we haven't already tried).

So first off speech... I am in Ohio, but near Cincinnati so opposite ends here, but we have Help Me Grow and once approved (which DS make it automatic) they send a ST out to your house weekly. Is that not an option there?
I keep getting this question A LOT. Our state does in home therapies up until age 3...Zoya was getting speech therapy once a week for an hour in our home. When she turned 3 services were turned over to the school district. In her IEP she has speech thearpy listed once a wee for 30 minutes...although most of that is not a pull out session...it is working with her in the classroom and helping classroom teachers know how to help her better with her communication. There is some pull out but definitely not enough for what Zoya needs. We started taking her to outpatient therapy once a week where we live and I still wasn't really seeing much improvement or progress like in all her other areas. That is when we decided to look into apraxia and the PROMPT therapy. We had a private evaluation done by two PROMPT trained therapists who impressed me a whole lot (posted about it a month ago maybe...too lazy to link it up right now). They concluded Zoya has "severe motor planning disorder which is greatly limiting her ability to verbally communicate"....AKA apraxia. Play therapy does not work for apraxia. This specific PROMPT approach (google PROMPT therapy) is designed for kids with apraxia and after tonight's session I'm even more convinced this is THE ONLY WAY we are going to see improvement with Zoya's speech...this therapy is AH-MAZ-ING...it just stinks we have to drive so far to find a trained therapist. There is simply no substitute for this therapy. Other mamas who've gone through the PROMPT therapy can chime in here with its awesomeness! Here is a blog (although I never commented) that got me really thinking about Zoya having apraxia and this is where I learned about PROMPT therapy and began researching it.

And just to add...as far as the poop situation....Zoya had awful diarrhea when we first brought her home, we finally did the gluten free diet and it did wonders....then she started having some constipation here and there...nothing horrible until last week when her teacher called me and said she was very worried about her. 3 hours later and she finally worked it out after miralax, 2 cups of apple juice, and a laxative...poor thing...then she gets scared to go the next time bc it hurt so bad...psychological constipation ha! That is why we decided to try the miralax but sheesh I'm thinking we could drop three grains of that stuff in her drink and it'd be enough after what happened these past few days...sheesh!

WOW THAT WAS A LOT! Thanks for all your comments and thoughts and ideas...you guys rock!

Off to prepare for our special visitors tomorrow....wait til you see whose coming!!!!!!!!!!!

The Tough Stuff

2011-07-26T13:40:00.000-04:00

Today I'm gonna play the "parenting a child with special needs is really hard" card. Or maybe it's the "trying to get the help your child needs even when you are a very knowledgeable parent with a background in special education is near impossible" card. (sigh) So go ahead and click the x at the top of your screen if you came here for cute pictures and happy thoughts today!

I've talked about Zoya's anxiety before. I've talked about having post traumatic stressors, possibly PTSD from orphanage life. She has specific triggers that make her very anxious and I just can't figure it all out. People with DS are more prone to anxiety disorders as well. So sorting out the cause of the anxiety and trying to figure out how we can help her has been difficult to say the least. Zoya is very comfortable and happy when she is home with us almost 100% of the time...its other places and people that make her anxious. I can't quite organize my thoughts fully with the situation and need some help...some professional advice....someone who will meet with her and us and give us an opinion of what is causing the anxiety and how we can help. We've tried all I know how to do. It seems to me the anxiety is getting worse and not better and I feel like I'm failing my girl. I will go to the ends of the earth to get her the help she needs but today I feel like I reached the end of the earth and fell off! LOL. I'm ready to waive the flag of surrender on this one.

So I contacted the fabulous doctor we saw at the adoption clinic in Pittsburgh when Zoya was first home. She gave me a contact number for a group of professionals all in one place including a psychologist who specializes in PTSD, a Dr. who specializes in DS, and another who specializes in adoption. Well trying to call them and coordinate an appointment was harder than trying to get a hold of the President. I don't have energy to go into all the details....just hoping they call me back and we can get something scheduled and someone can help!

One question I do have, if anyone can answer.....Zoya sleeps 12 hours a night and usually naps 2 hours, sometimes 3 hours. I'm SO not complaining...but even after sleeping 12 hours some nights, like last night, she still seems tired.....tired in the "tired and cranky" sort of way....not always but sometimes. I wonder if she is not sleeping well...she's always been a restless sleeper, but her ped. said it was nothing to worry about. I could request a sleep study but with her anxiety I might rather be fed piece by piece to sharks. Could the anxiety be a result of not sleeping well if she does has sleep apnea or some other sleep disorder? I suppose the only way to find out is a sleep study. Anyone have experience with anxiety cured by fixing a sleep disorder? It's a long shot but it can't hurt to ask...

And to top it off we have speech in Buffalo tonight, which is proving to be quite the ordeal....we go during rush hour which is the only time she has available (other than Zoya's nap time which would be even worse) and its been taking 2 hours to get there. Last time it took over two hours and then Zoya cried the first 10 minutes while I tried not to cry myself. She needs this type of therapy, I can see progress already, but at what cost? When do we say enough and just hibernate in our house and enjoy life? I want her to be all she can be, but I want her happy too. This might be the hardest part of parenting...knowing when to push and knowing when to lay off. Finding that balance is hard.

And then there's the poop.....oh I've been up to my elbows in poop. Zoya had some pretty bad constipation a week ago so we started her on Miralax....Ummmm NO.THANK.YOU.MR.MIRALAX! This is even worse :( I've never experienced anything like it in my life! 4 changes of bedding, 4 loads of laundry, and 4 baths....in the past 2 days...well lets just say this is my new diet plan and its working fabulously well! AND I'm hoping its all out of her system before we get in the car and drive 2 hours to speech and 2 hours back tonight....

And this concludes the session on "I'm-having-a-bad-day-101." Thank you for your time...please feel free to fill out the evaluation form on your way out.

Conversations in the Crib

2011-07-24T13:25:00.001-04:00

I'm sitting down for a hot second before continuing with the madness that has consumed my busy days lately....BUT I'm cracking up as I listen to Zoya over the monitor trying to settle down for her nap. Here's what I hear:

Meeeeeeeee Gooooooooo (me go) [she recently learned to say 'me go' and 'me do']

Mama peeeeeeee (mama please) [paired with fake crying, then followed by a mad-scientist laugh]

Eh-mo peeeeeee (Elmo please)

No No No No.....YAH (she has multiple personalities conversing with one another I think)

Mama blaallaa (mama ball)......Peeeeee (please)

Aaaahhhhhhh-doooooo (ahh-choo) [she thinks its funny to fake sneeze]

Ahhhhh-duhhh (all done) [umm no you're not...mama's counting on a good 2 hour nap today...please?]

And now I hear silence.....ahhhhhh!

No Tears Today!

2011-07-21T14:20:00.000-04:00

Zoya has been a bit emotional lately...maybe its due to all the new activities in her life....maybe its a stage....maybe she just wants to watch my hair turn grey overnight...whatever it may be its wearing me out! Things she used to love to do she is suddenly afraid of....and I'm learning my leg was made for her to glue herself to if I dare try to put her down. She has to be in our arms in any place we go into...so strange. I think she's figuring out she likes her mama and daddy the mostest and she no longer enjoys running up to strangers for hugs....I guess its not all bad LOL. So the past two weeks of school Zoya had a hard time with me leaving (she only goes once a week which could be part of the issue)...one day was REALLY ugly and I got in my car and cried. I could handle if she was pushing other kids or not listening....but crying for me not to leave her? RIP. MY. HEART. OUT! Well that really bad day I ended up picking her up from school sick so I think she was just trying to tell me she didn't feel up to going to school...poor bug :(

So last night I could feel the knots forming in my tummy worrying about the "drop off" today. It is so hard to see her so upset and crying and then I just leave her? It just stinks! So I prayed and prayed and prayed, I prayed instead of eating breakfast, I prayed while I packed her backpack, I prayed on the drive to school, and I prayed the whole way down the hall, trying to keep my heart from beating out of my chest. Really sounds dramatic but its true! LOL. This time instead of making her walk on her own (my "buck up and be a big girl" thoughts) I carried her into school and the whole way down the hall and held her while I signed her in and then walked into the classroom holding her and let HER tell ME when she was ready....a couple minutes and she was playing with the dollhouse with her teacher. She gave me a kiss and off I went...a happy mama with a happy girl!!! Her teacher reported that she had a good day, and only acted whiny or sad when she was told no LOL. I'm sure its not the end of the tears and not every day will go as smoothly but I'm feeling pretty happy that she didn't want to go home when I came to pick her up! Seriously I'd rather have that than her crying and upset because I'm leaving her. She had marker colored from head to toe when I picked her up...I think she got more on herself than on her paper...for sure! They said "she REALLY likes markers." I thought, thats because she doesn't get to use markers much at home or she ends up like this! Oh Zoya girl....you keep us on our toes thats for sure.

Potty Update, Zoya Can Whistle, and other Random Cuteness

2011-07-19T20:49:00.000-04:00

Potty Update: We've been semi-potty training for over a year but honestly I think its the best way to train some kids with DS....slow and steady wins the race. No pressure, no stress. Zoya had been doing fabulous with a potty schedule and was just about "schedule trained" around March-ish. She would stay dry as long as we took her about every 45 minutes. Well then one day she just regressed and was no longer even semi-schedule trained. We decided we weren't going to push it and we put her back in pull ups full time and didn't stress about it. I did NOT want potty to become a power struggle so I just gave it a little break. We still took her several times a day at that point but nothing like we had been.

After our Florida trip we started up the serious potty business again :) We decided (with advice from a friend who is a behavior specialist and mama of two) to only reward her for dry pants and ignore wet pants-as in not even say anything when she wet her pants. I wasn't sure about it, but Zoya needs LOTS of positive encouragement and tends to either shy away or engage in a power struggle when she feels forced to do something and then nobody wins. So for a few days we checked her pants every 10 minutes or so and if she was dry we made a big deal about it and gave her an m&m. After a few days Zoya started telling us she was dry on occasion and asking for an m&m...smart girl haha. And guess what? Zoya is now initiating potty MANY times throughout the day! If she hasn't gone in an hour or so we will ask her if she needs to go or just take her, but she has been dry most of the past week! AND I figured out how to tell if she REALLY has to go or if she is trying to get out of something LOL. If she's just trying to get out of something (like eating at the table) she will actually sign "potty." She also does this in every store we go to when she sees a door that could lead to a potty. But we know she really has to go when she grabs her pull up or underwear....not the best sign to use but hey it works for now! We're still using pull ups most of the time unless we're going to be home for a long period of time....but its great because she only uses 2 pull ups a day. She usually wakes up wet after her nap, which I'm not worrying about for a while longer. In a few more weeks I will have her wear the underwear more and pull ups less. Hopefully it keeps up! Oh and #2? FORGET IT!

Here is some Zoya cuteness because I haven't posted in a while! I've been a little busy ;)

And.....the other day Zoya and I were home alone and I heard this loud whistling....I though what in the world? So I peeked into the living room from the kitchen and she was sitting on the couch whistling! It's the cutest thing ever!! It's a little hard to hear on this video but if you turn the volume up you should be able to hear it. I'm going to try to get a better video when she's not looking! It seems like she is whistling by sucking air in instead of blowing out but I think she can do both! So funny! I couldn't whistle until I was in HS...this girls got talent!! I love hearing her randomly whistle throughout the house its so cute!

BEACH TRIP GIVEAWAY!!!!!

2011-07-16T18:24:00.000-04:00

HOP OVER TO LAINA'S BLOG to read all about how you can win a trip to Panama City Beach Florida!!!!! The condo is absolutely beautiful!!!!!

www.hopefulheartadoption.blogspot.com

Thank you!!!

And Now that You Know THIS Secret....

2011-07-11T21:29:00.000-04:00

I'll share a little more.....

Check it out HERE

AND HERE

Add yourself as a follower....the journey is sure to be full of excitement!!

The Secret is Revealed.....

2011-07-11T21:07:00.000-04:00

Who...

2011-07-11T08:30:00.001-04:00

Have a great day :)

P.S. isn't that shirt so darn cute??? ;)

Preschool Update

2011-07-07T14:50:00.000-04:00

Zoya had her third day of preschool today! I think having her go once a week throughout the summer before "real" preschool starts is going to be great for her (and me). She had a tough day last week with some crying which just broke this mama's heart :( She was clingy and didn't want me to go, but I got her engaged in playing and said goodbye and left for a meeting at another location in the school and she seemed okay. When I walked past Zoya's class 45 minutes later to get something from my room (seriously...I really needed something from my room, I can prove it! LOL) I heard the unmistakable sound of Zoya crying. Apparently she was afraid of her chair at snack time. She has a thing about chairs that I've talked about before....basically its chairs when involved with food...she loves to eat but for some reason she gets terrified when she has to sit in a chair to eat....like when someone tells her she has to sit there, but she will do it on her own free will...strang. We worked through the problem at home and its no longer an issue, so we gave the classroom staff a few strategies we use to help her through it and she had a MUCH better day today. Good thing because last week I came home and cried and couldn't take seeing her so upset and I really prayed for peace for her today! Zoya seems to have overall anxiety in new situations sometimes and with specific events/objects (like chairs paired with food....and artificial plants...haha its true). Trying to figure her anxiety out is tricky because there are so many factors.....orphanage life (PTSD?), down syndrome, 3 year old behavior, etc. She has come a long way but we are still trying to find strategies that help her feel less stressed and anxious and preventing her from going past the point of no return with some of her fears and anxieties.

Shawn and I went on a breakfast date today since he didn't have to work until later and Zoya was in school! It was strange to be out in daylight alone with my husband and no child! During our "date," I got a call from one of the wonderful staff members...and I panicked because who calls to give good news? LOL. But it was great news and she told me Zoya was doing fantastic and sat in her chair for snack with no problems :)

When I picked her up today she saw me and got a huge smile and hugged me and wouldn't let me out of her sight! Then she saw her class walking back to the classroom and followed right along at the end of the line like a good little girl. I was so very proud of her...she did it with no prompting or anything. I followed her back to her classroom and when I told her it was time to leave she parked herself in a CHAIR at a table and didn't wanna leave. Go figure! I'd rather see her not wanting to leave because she loves it so much rather than crying when I leave! We are so blessed with an amazing group of professionals who are involved in Zoya's preschool plan. They love her and are so good with her!

More Fourth of July Fun

2011-07-05T20:28:00.000-04:00

We have been so very busy around here. I swear I'm busier now having the summer off from work than I am during the school year! Yikes! Between swimming lessons, school, therapies, and trying to squeeze in some good old fun, we are watching the days fly by! I can't even believe how fast the summer is happening!

After our picnic and a nap for Zoya yesterday, we cooked out, went swimming, and then took a little trip to the playground. I'd say Zoya had fun! However it didn't keep her from getting up early AGAIN....what happened to my angel child who used to sleep in until 8:30? I still can't complain, I mean most of the time she sleeps through the night except the other morning at 4am where I heard giggles and "mama" over the monitor for about 10 minutes before she fell back asleep! Funny girl.

Here is Miss America in her patriotic bathing suit (thanks Jess).

Okay, is it me or does she look way older than 3 here? Oh my baby where have you gone!?

Zoya loves to jump (aka loves to be pulled into the pool)

Lovin' on my sweet girl

Love this face!

Learning to float alone ( you wouldn't think thats difficult in a life jacket, but let me tell ya.....oiy)

Saying "more"...with a New Jersey accent....seriously!

Loving the swing

We tried the regular swing but that was not so successful as Zoya promptly fell flat on her back. Maybe next summer :)

We are hanging in there with the swimming lessons.....it usually goes like this: Coax her to get in, she gets in, she cries for a few minutes, she tells the instructor no a few hundred times all while doing what they ask her to do, clapping for herself when she does something she was afraid to do, get in line to jump in the pool, try her hardest to just say hi to the kids but inevitably squeezes at least one of them because she just can't help it, free time to play where she is getting really good at walking in waist-deep water without falling over....coax her to get out! LOL.

And incase you thought this girl was getting any less sassy lately.....here is what happened tonight:

Shawn to Zoya: "You need to listen....."

Zoya proceeds to plug her ears and look the other way while Shawn tries not to bust out laughing at her naughtiness! 3 years old going on 16!

I think I'm in big trouble when this girl actually is 16!!!

Happy Fourth of July!

2011-07-04T16:59:00.001-04:00

Celebrating our second year of our Fourth of July family tradition....at our favorite, most magical spot ever! You can see last year's pictures HERE. How much our little lady has changed in a year! And by the grace of God she will never remember what it was like to not be free!

Pool Pictures

2011-07-02T14:14:00.000-04:00

Here are some pictures of Miss Zoya having fun at the pool in Florida. She likes swimming as long as she can hold on to somebody!

Speech and Apraxia

2011-06-29T19:23:00.000-04:00

Oh.....speech.....sigh. It's SO hard for Zoya. Currently, Zoya receives outpatient speech therapy at the local hospital once a week for 30 minutes. Before she turned 3, she got speech for an hour every other week at home. With it being summer, she is only receiving minimal therapy through school. She can say 10-15 words, although they don't always come out the same way....she has lots more approximations, but overall, her speech skills just aren't really close to her other skills developmentally. About six months ago I started wondering about APRAXIA, which is a motor planning disorder that makes speech pretty difficult. Just recently children with Down Syndrome have been getting diagnosed with apraxia more and more. The old theory was that kids with DS couldn't also have apraxia, but more recent research shows that is not true. Apraxia is also referred to as childhood apraxia of speech, verbal dyspraxia, or oral apraxia.

Here is a definition of apraxia taken from http://www.asha.org/public/speech/disorders/childhoodapraxia.htm:
Childhood apraxia of speech (CAS) is a motor speech disorder. Children with CAS have problems saying sounds, syllables, and words. This is not because of muscle weakness or paralysis. The brain has problems planning to move the body parts (e.g., lips, jaw, tongue) needed for speech. The child knows what he or she wants to say, but his/her brain has difficulty coordinating the muscle movements necessary to say those words.

Zoya is a tough cookie to figure out. She shows some signs/symptoms of apraxia but other things she shouldn't be able to do with apraxia, she can. All cases of apraxia present a little different so it's not exactly easy to figure out in some kids. Zoya's inconsistency in words/sounds is a big concern as well as losing words after she has learned to say them. For an example of inconsistency...the word "baby." Sometimes it comes out sounding exactly like "baby," other times she will just say "ba" or "baba." Vowels are very difficult for Zoya. She will learn one vowel, like long o, and then learn long e and no longer be able to say long o. She can imitate many isolated consonant sounds, but gets all mixed up when trying to produce more than one syllable. She also cannot mimic movement of her tongue like she should be able to. If I say stick your tongue out, she can do that, but she cannot move it up or down or side to side on command. It's just kinda there wiggling around, trying its hardest LOL.

So no therapists, until today, have been able to answer this question: "Is Zoya's speech developing sequentially like it should be, just delayed?" Kids with DS meet milestones, typically they just meet them later than children without developmental delays. This would be true for speech as well, and I hear the magic number for speech to really start taking off for kids with DS is around 4 years old. So, since Zoya is only 3, most therapists have had the "wait and see" approach....just saying, "she'll get it, let's just wait and see..." meanwhile just doing the same play therapy over and over. The play therapy has been great for Zoya's language skills, but has not done a whole lot for speech skills. I don't really like anything about the "wait and see approach" since she already waited the first 22 months of her life with no therapy. I've been pretty frustrated with speech therapy to say the least....up until today.

Today we drove to Buffalo, an hour and 45 minute drive, to meet with a couple therapists who are trained in the PROMPT speech technique. For the first time I felt lots of hope for Zoya's speech progress. These ladies are amazing and so knowledgeable about speech in general, and specifically apraxia. They are highly trained and LOVE what they do. They are in it to HELP kids and want to see progress just as much as I do. It is not JUST a job for them. I could tell that even before I met them, just talking on the phone to them. One of the therapists has a son who was diagnosed with apraxia and the other therapist was her son's therapist so they make a great team. They do all the evaluations together and then we will work with just one of them for therapy. They were shocked to hear that during the school year Zoya will only get speech therapy once a week for 30 minutes....and that is not all one-on-one either. They both work in early intervention through preschool age and said if we lived there Zoya would definitely get speech therapy through the school THREE to FIVE times a week! I said, "Well I guess that's why we are here." And they said, "Well I guess that's why out state is bankrupt and yours isn't." HAHAH.

They pretty positively told me that Zoya's speech is NOT following a typical development pattern that you would see in most children with DS. They saw many signs of a motor planning disorder such as apraxia. They were impressed with her jaw strength and muscle tone so we do have that going for us! There were lots of things she could do that they were very impressed with....so it wasn't all bad news. Although I could care less about whether or not she is diagnosed with apraxia, I DO care about the techniques that should be used with her based on the fact that she is likely apraxic. Traditional play therapy techniques do not help apraxia. Zoya tolerated the PROMPT technique very well and I have high hopes it will help her learn to speak. They don't solely do the PROMPT technique, they have some other tricks up their sleeves, but their overall approach REALLY impressed me! She may never speak in full sentences (or she may) but she can definitely learn some functional language to communicate her way through life. When they said there is a motor planning disorder, I had a brief moment of sadness and got a lump in my throat and wanted to cry, but I got over it quickly and was almost relieved to hear someone say what I already knew. Mamas should always trust their instincts. So now that we've got an idea of the problem and a way to help it, I feel a lot better. The only problem is that it will not be fun driving an hour and 45 minutes one way once a week. It is also private therapy and out of state so that means insurance won't cover it. So I told Shawn he needs to sell more drugs (no worries, he is a pharmacist, so he legally sells them!).

I'd love to hear from other DS Mama's about what their kiddos receive as far as speech services.....how many hours/sessions per week and any specific techniques used? What has been helpful for your children in the speech department? Other Apraxia/DS Mamas out there? My next topic of research that I'm just starting to dive into is Augmentative and Assistive Communication Devices to help be her voice in the meantime.

More Beach Pictures!

2011-06-25T12:38:00.000-04:00

Getting ready for the beach and Zoya got a little nutty!

footprints dissapearing in time....

Oh I thought sand would taste better than this!

This is pretty gross!

Why didn't someone tell me not to eat the sand? Oh what? You DID tell me?? Hmmm I must not have heard you.

Oh how I wish I could be right there right now!

Great First Day!

2011-06-23T18:52:00.000-04:00

Zoya's teacher reported that she had a great first day! She said she tried to hug and kiss everyone all morning long...funny part is there were no other girls in her class today...just boys!! She really liked one little boy in particular, probably because he was the only one smaller than her and she loves people who are smaller than her! HA. When I walked into the classroom to pick her up she got a real big smile like HEY I KNOW YOU! And she ran over to me and hugged me! Sweet girl. I also got a call from Zoya's speech therapist who visited her in the classroom today and she said Zoya did fantastic! She said Zoya followed directions and listened well! Zoya's teacher said Zoya did a nice job following directions even though she was saying "no" while doing what was asked of her! She does that all the time, says no but then does what she is asked anyways...stinker. Her ST also said she already seems attached to her teacher because when the teacher had to step out of the room for a moment Zoya ran to the window and watched for her and seemed sad. Apparently she had some trouble sitting on the carpet and would rather socialize with her new boyfriend than sit in her spot! She also decided sitting at the snack table was for the birds and would only stand. This goes back to her fear of chairs I always talk about...who knows with this girl. Either way I'm way proud of her doing such a good job on her first day of school! When I picked her up I said were you a good girl? And she said "goo goo yah." Then I said did you keep your hands to yourself? And she got real big eyes and didn't say anything...she always busts herself!

Here is a cute video I took after school while Zoya was eating lunch today. I'm pretty sure she's already learned something after her first day....how to take a big drink and then say AHHHHH. The first time she did it I cracked up because I'd never seen her do that before. I asked her if the kids at school did that and she said "yah!" I didn't think to pick up my camera until after most of our conversation was over lol.

Zoya's First (unofficial) Day of Preschool

2011-06-23T09:50:00.000-04:00

Okay so dropping her off was maybe the hardest thing I've EVER done...I'm talking harder than our entire adoption process (okay so maybe I'm being dramatic but I do feel like I left a piece of my heart in that preschool room this morning). Zoya did fabulous. She woke up and I told her she was going to school! She clapped and patted her chest and said "Zoya" (more like row-row these days lol), then signed "school" and then signed "home." If you're a Signing Time fan like us and you've seen the "School" episode they always sing a song about going home at the end so I was thrilled to know in my heart she knew she'd be coming back home and I wouldn't be leaving her there forever. Since this is the first time that we've left her somewhere else, I worry that she will be scared and wonder why I left. Hopefully she understands she will be coming home...I think she does. Her teacher's name is Miss Anna and Zoya signed "banana" every time I told her she was going to see miss Anna. I guess Zoya has already made up a sign for her teacher haha.

Anyways, I put her backpack on (which only had her happy pillow-just in case-a change of clothes, a few pull-ups, and her snack) and she just about fell over it was so heavy for her! LOL. I was shaking as I pulled out of the driveway and kept thinking "Is it too late to un-sign-her-up for preschool???" We got to the school and Zoya squealed with excitement...she has been to school many times to visit me and a couple times for preschool visits-and she loves it there. She walked into her classroom all by herself like a big girl while I snuck some photos and tried not to cry. I walked in with her gave her a hug and kiss and reminded her to be a good girl so she can watch Elmo. There were 4 boys playing already and she joined right in. I stepped out to sign her in and she followed me out. Her teacher told her to say goodbye to mama. She said bye and waved, blew a kiss, walked into the classroom and closed the door behind her! I'd say she was ready!!

Tears welled up in my eyes as I walked away. I tried to hold it together until I got out of the building and was mostly successful with the exception of one little tear that just couldn't wait. I called Shawn when I got in the car and cried :( I cried the whole 2 minute drive home and I'm still crying now! What is wrong with me???Looking back from when we brought Zoya home, she is a different child. She has overcome so much. She is so strong and brave to have been through all she has and still have such a love for life. So being able to get to this point is a huge milestone for her. From belly crawling and being ignored in the orphanage to walking proudly all by herself into a preschool classroom where she will learn and make friends....well it just seems impossible to have come this far in such a short amount of time!

And can it seriously only be 9:37?? I feel like I dropped her off hours ago! Watching the clock until noon! I hope she is doing okay!!

It is very strange sitting here in this quiet house all alone. I haven't been alone in this house for over 10 minutes since Zoya came home! What in the world did I do with all my time before Zoya???? I guess I will go vacuum...2 hours and 16 minutes until pick up!!!

Sassy 'tude

2011-06-22T19:58:00.000-04:00

Tomorrow's the big day! OH MY. Zoya did great with her preschool visit this morning and I hope she is ready for tomorrow! I hope she doesn't pull her sassy card on the first day! What? You don't believe this girl is sassy? Here is what happened at the doctor's office the other day:

Me: Zoya you need to go potty before we leave.

Zoya: NO!

Me: You don't tell your mama No or you sit in time out, now go.

Zoya: (Glaring at me not saying No but not moving either)

Me: Zoya you need to start walking NOW. If you don't go you will sit in time out. ONE.

Zoya: TWO!

Me: You can count but when I get to THREE you sit in time out, now MARCH.

Zoya: (Marches in place with raised eyebrows).

Me: That's TWO!

Zoya: (rolls her eyes while walking to the bathroom).

And here is what happened after speech today as Zoya and her therapist came walking out to meet me:

Therapist to Zoya: "Are YOU going to tell her or am I?"

Zoya: (quiet) then yells and signs, "Goo goo" (good girl)

Therapist: TRY AGAIN.

Me: UH OH :(

Zoya lost her Elmo privileges for the night and was pretty sad about that LOL. What a stinker!

I'll be sure to report how tomorrow goes! Say a prayer (for me). HAHA.